


The Sound of Voices Two

by Ailendolin



Series: Moments of a Different Past [1]
Category: The Pacific - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon-Typical Violence, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Major Character Injury
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-01
Updated: 2015-04-01
Packaged: 2018-02-11 08:07:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 25
Words: 32,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2060478
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ailendolin/pseuds/Ailendolin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A series of moments shared between Andrew Haldane and Edward Jones, as witnessed by Eugene Sledge.</p><p><b>Excerpt:</b><br/><i>For a moment, Haldane stares at him as if can’t quite believe Hillbilly is really volunteering to do his paperwork for him. “You know I’d never expect you to do that for me, Eddie,” he says.</i> </p><p>  <i>Hillbilly shrugs. “That’s why I’m offering. You’re too damn stubborn to ask for help even when you need it.” He pauses. “I’m always willing to help you, Andy. You just have to let me.”</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Pavuvu – Late June 1944

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, everyone! Just a couple of quick notes:  
> 1\. This is my first time writing for this fandom and pairing (Andy/Eddie needs more stories, right?). The idea behind this story was to write little snippets between Andy and Eddie from Eugene's POV which is why this story starts on Pavuvu. The chapters vary in length and the story will go AU during Peleliu ;)  
> 2\. 15 chapters are already written and just need to be revised. The story will have a total of maybe 20 chapters. I'll upload chapter 2 tomorrow.  
> 3\. A sequel/prequel thing is already in the works, from Andy and Eddie's POVs, which will cover their time in Australia, Gloucester, probably Pavuvu, Peleliu and Okinawa, and their lives after the war.  
> 4\. Since the story is from Eugene's POV, he will constantly refer to Andy and Eddie as Haldane and Hillbilly.  
> 5\. For the record, I'm from Germany and thus not a native speaker and since I don't have a beta reader, there will most likely be some mistakes in this story, so do not hesitate to point them out so I can fix them :)  
> 6\. The title comes from the Wailin' Jenny song "One Voice".  
> That's it! I really hope you enjoy the story.

**1\. Pavuvu – Late June 1944**

War is everywhere around Eugene and yet still so very far away. The sun is high and warm on Pavuvu and, apart from scrubbing drums, calisthenics, shooting practice and the hated rats and land crabs, it’s pretty much like being on vacation. Only when he looks into the eyes of the veterans from Guadalcanal and Cape Gloucester does he see a reflection of things that will follow Pavuvu sooner or later: horror, desperation, terror and loss. He tries not to think too much about it, will face it when the time comes. And it's easy, with everyone being relatively carefree, laughing at improper jokes, pulling pranks on each other or simply enjoying a sunny day in the Pacific.

On his way to the mess tent he meets Burgin and together they get their chow and sit down at one of the tables. Snafu joins them a moment later, with a lazy grin on his face and mischief sparkling in his eyes, and before Eugene knows what’s happening, Snafu spoons up some of Eugene’s rice and drops it onto his own plate.

“You don’t mind, do you?” he drawls, still grinning.

Eugene stares at him for a moment and then, without breaking eye contact, scoops up some more of his rice and dumps it on Snafu’s plate.

“Of course not,” he says with a pleasant smile that is obviously fake. “Enjoy your chow, Shelton.”

Across the table, Burgin laughs and Snafu grins, and Eugene feels a little more at home with them. They settle into a comfortable silence and Eugene uses the time to take a look around the mess tent. It’s not yet overtly crowded, since people pretty much come and go as they please and more often than not take their meals down to the beach instead of eating it in the mess tent.

Not too far from where they’re sitting, Eugene can see Haldane and Hillbilly waiting in line to get their own meals. He wonders why they don’t go to the officer’s mess where meals are most likely somewhat nicer and less monotone, but chalks it up to Haldane and Hillbilly probably not wanting to be treated better than their men. They seem like that kind of people.

He watches as they slowly move down the line. Haldane looks frustrated and exhausted, a huge difference from the day Eugene saw him the first time, and he wonders what is wrong. It’s quiet enough in the tent that Eugene catches what they’re talking about if he listens carefully.

“I’m not even done with the last mission reports and they’re already briefing us on the next mission,” Haldane is saying in a harsh whisper. “Hell, I haven’t even finished writing all the letters home to the parents who will never see their sons again.”

Hillbilly looks at him for a moment. “I could help,” he offers quietly.

Haldane shakes his head. “Thank you, Eddie, but that is one thing I have to do on my own.”

“Then let me write up the reports, at last,” Hillbilly insists. “I saw the same things you saw on Gloucester. It won’t make a difference to command who types them up, as long as your signature is on them in the end.”

For a moment, Haldane stares at him as if can’t quite believe Hillbilly is really volunteering to do his paperwork for him. “You know I’d never expect you to do that for me, Eddie,” he says.

Hillbilly shrugs. “That’s why I’m offering. You’re too damn stubborn to ask for help even when you need it.” He pauses. “I’m always willing to help you, Andy. You just have to let me.”

Almost bashful, Haldane glances down at his tray that is currently being laden with food. When he looks up again, there’s a soft smile on his face, full of things Eugene can’t even begin to name.

“Well, then. I’d really appreciate your help on the reports, Eddie,” he hears Haldane say quietly, earnestly. Hillbilly simply nods at him, picks up his tray and then they’re leaving the tent, with Hillbilly a step behind Haldane, just like Eugene has seen them on his first day on Pavuvu.

“There go the best Marines you’ll ever see,” Snafu comments when he sees Eugene watching them leave.

Eugene looks at him. “How long have they known each other?” he asks, suddenly curious about those two extraordinary men.

It’s Burgin who answers. “They met briefly on Guadalcanal, I think, but weren’t in the same unit. The story is that Ack-Ack’s apparently been so enamored by something Hillbilly did on that island that he convinced Hillbilly’s CO’s to give him a battlefield commission. Hillbilly was made a lieutenant and Ack-Ack a captain, and in Australia Ack-Ack got his own company and made sure Hillbilly was part of it – and they lived happily ever after.”

Burgin winks at them while Snafu snorts; Eugene can’t really keep the grin off his face, either.

“No, seriously,” Burgin adds, “that’s pretty much the gist of it. Those two make the finest command team I’ve ever seen.”

“And why’s that?” Eugene asks.

“Because they complement each other,” Burgin tells him. “When one falters, the other steps up to the task. They don't even need to talk to know what the other needs.”

Next to Eugene, Snafu stretches and pushes his empty bowl away from him. “I’m telling you now: if either of them gets hit, the other soon will follow.”

Eugene doesn’t know what to say to that, and apparently neither does Burgin, so the three of them stand up, put their trays away and leave. Having seen Haldane and Hillbilly only a couple of times since he came to Pavuvu, Eugene can’t say whether or not Snafu’s right, but he knows for sure that he never wants to see the day when he has to find out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don't make any money with this story. This work is based on the HBO mini-series The Pacific and the characters portrayed therein. I mean no disrespect to the real men who fought in the PTO.


	2. Pavuvu – Mid-July 1944

**2\. Pavuvu – Mid-July 1944**

Eugene and Snafu are there to welcome Burgin back from his vacation on Banika, courtesy of Haldane. For days, after Burgin had left, Snafu had grumbled about them, “guarding a warehouse, my ass! I’m telling you, they’re just going to get roaring drunk over there, having a good time while we deal with those ugly-ass rats and fucking land crabs.” Eugene had been happy for Burgin, Hillbilly and the other guys getting a little reprieve from Pavuvu, but then he’d only been here for a couple of weeks and doesn’t mind the rats and land crabs that much, yet. Snafu, on the other hand, had been grating on his nerves and Eugene’s more than happy for Burgin to return so Snafu has someone else to vent to and, consequently, piss off.

He’s also looking forward to having Hillbilly back with them. While it had been nice of Haldane to grant him and the others some off-time, Haldane hadn’t been as generous with himself. Eugene had barely seen him the last few days, only in the mess tent on occasion and even then Haldane had always been working on something. If Hillbilly had been there, Eugene is sure, he’d have taken the papers right out of Haldane’s hand and only given them back once Haldane had eaten his meal in peace.

Looking around, Eugene is not surprised to see Haldane standing a few feet away from him and Snafu. They nod at each other and patiently wait for the boat to arrive. When it finally does, Eugene can barely stop himself from laughing out loud at the sight that Burgin, Hillbilly and two others present. Snafu doesn’t even try to hide his cackle while Haldane looks at his Marines with a mixture of shock, disapproval and amusement.

“Now, look who we have here,” Snafu drawls with a grin as Burgin comes slowly ashore, looking absolutely awful. Burgin just glares at him. “Tell me, Burgie, did you have fun on Banika?”

Burgin rubs his temples. “It sure was quieter there,” he grumbles.

Snafu grins. “Isn’t it nice, being back with your buddies? You look so well-rested and relaxed, I’m sure we can find some work detail for you. How about hunting some some rats, huh?”

“For heaven’s sake, fuck off, Snafu,” Burgin growls and makes his way up the beach slowly, probably to crash in his tent and ignore everyone and everything around him. Snafu follows him, dancing around him, talking more loudly than usual just to aggravate Burgin. Eugene watches them go and shakes his head in amusement, mentally wishing Burgin good luck for his much-needed sleep. He doubts Snafu will let him have it.

He turns his attention back towards the men coming onshore and sees Hillbilly going up to Haldane, coming to a halt and standing at attention in front of him. “Sir,” he says by way of greeting, swaying slightly and squinting against the sun.

Haldane stares at him for a moment incredulously, then asks, “Eddie, what the hell happened to you?”

Hillbilly shrugs. “Apparently I shouldn’t mix juice and alcohol together, or keep on drinking just the alcohol after the juice runs out – turns out it’s not a good idea, especially when you haven’t had a drop of alcohol in the past four years.”

“You did what?” Haldane asks, disbelievingly. Hillbilly winces at the noise. “Eddie, you were supposed to rest on Banika, have a nice time, not get drunk out of your mind. What were you thinking?”

“Sorry, sir,” Hillbilly mumbles quietly, looking for all intents and purposes like a puppy that’s being scolded. “Couldn’t say no when the guys offered.”

Haldane shakes his head exasperatedly, but his smile is fond when he says, “I don’t even dare to think about what would have happened to you in Melbourne if I hadn’t been there. Do you always get drunk when you’re off the leash?”

Eugene can tell that Haldane means it as a joke, but Hillbilly’s answer is honest. “Not really,” he says. “It’s just, I figured I might as well strike that one off my bucket list. Who knows if I’ll ever get another opportunity to get drunk again?”

Haldane doesn’t say anything for a moment, just stares at him contemplatively while the words sink in. “Come on, Eddie,” he says finally, “let’s get you to your tent and settled down. You look like you’re about to drop.”

“Nah,” Hillbilly says, but he accepts the supporting arm around his shoulders nonetheless, Eugene notes. “Just got a headache. Burgin’s got it worse. Can’t even eat anything, the poor bastard.”

Haldane laughs at that and starts guiding Hillbilly up the beach. “Honestly, Eddie,” he says, just before they are out of earshot, “I’m never letting you out of my sight again.”

Eugene barely catches Hillbilly’s reply. “Alright, Andy.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is based on real events as described by Burgin in his book _Islands of the Damned_. According to him, on 04.07.1944 Andy sent about 10 people, Eddie and Burgin among them, for two weeks to Banika where they were guarding a warehouse filled with drinks. It was basically a vacation, since the guys were on duty for 4 hours and then had the next 96 hours off. One Saturday, four of them started pouring alcohol into a canteen cup and filled it up with grapefruit juice. When the juice ran out, they continued drinking just the alchohol. The night ended with Burgin tucking the other three into bed. Burgin himself was so bad off that he started vomiting blood and couldn't eat anything until thursday, five days later.
> 
> This chapter takes place on Monday, assuming that the guys slept all through Sunday after that fateful night of drinking.


	3. Pavuvu – Early August 1944

**3\. Pavuvu – Early August 1944**

After a long day filled with training exercises, Eugene’s lying on his cot, perfectly content to waste the rest of the day away doing nothing, even though tonight is movie night which is usually one of the highlights of the week on Pavuvu. It’s even more fun since some of the men tend to provide their own commentary during the movies, turning them into a once-in-a-lifetime experience for everyone involved. Eugene’s not sure if he wants to go, however. He’s exhausted and really wants to sleep.

The decision is made for him when Snafu barges into their tent and throws a dirty boot at him. “Come on, Sledge, get your ass up and let’s go. You’re already pretty enough without your beauty sleep.”

Eugene throws the boot back at him halfheartedly, aiming for Snafu’s head and missing his target spectacularly. Snafu snorts. “That how you want to kill Japs?”

“Funny,” Eugene says, but he gets up anyway, knowing that Snafu won’t stop bothering him until he relents. He pulls his own boots on, and together with Snafu and Burgin who’s waiting for them outside he makes his way to the clearing where movies are shown two or three times a week. There’s a white sheet already hanging between coconut trees that functions as a screen, and though it’s nothing like a real movie theater, it’s one of the few things on Pavuvu that provides some kind of distraction for the Marines, and they’re all glad for it.

Burgin chooses a spot far in the back at the edge of the clearing, and they all sit down on one of the many coconut logs that are lying around. They have a good view of the screen and are just waiting for the movie to start when Eugene notices Haldane and Hillbilly walking past them to a fallen tree a little to the left of them and away from the rest. Surprised, he glances at Burgin who shrugs. It’s not every day that both Haldane and Hillbilly attend the movies. Usually, it’s just Hillbilly alone, except for those few occasions where he manages to drag Haldane away from his work.

“I really don’t have time for this, Eddie,” Eugene hears Haldane say quietly, confirming Eugene’s suspicions that Haldane is not here entirely voluntarily.

Hillbilly raises an eyebrow at him. “I don’t care,” he says simply.

Eugene almost snorts at Haldane’s incredulous expression.

“Well, I do,” Haldane says, indignantly. “And anyway, is that the way to talk to your captain?”

Hillbilly just keeps looking at him, completely unimpressed. “Probably not, but I’m here to give my best friend a break from all the work he’s taken upon himself, so my captain will just have to deal with it.”

Haldane sighs. “My work won’t disappear just because you make me watch a movie, you know that, right?”

“Yeah,” Hillbilly nods, “but at least you get a change of scenery and two hours as far away from work as is possible here. You really need to relax more, Andy,” he adds quietly. Eugene agrees with Hillbilly on that.

“I know,” Haldane agrees, grudgingly.

“Do you?” Hillbilly challenges, and there’s something fierce in his eyes. “Because I don’t think you do. I haven’t seen you outside your tent in the last few days except for chow, and sometimes not even for that because you forget that it’s time to eat. You -“ he stops himself when he realizes that he’s started to raise his voice and takes a deep breath, trying to calm down. He continues more quietly, “Look, Andy, I just want you to live a little, okay? You’re allowed to have fun every once in a while; you need to, in the kind of world we live in. Just, let yourself have some moments to enjoy your life.”

Haldane stares at Hillbilly for a moment, and he must see something in his eyes because suddenly, he's smiling softly. “Okay.”

“Okay?” Eugene can hear the disbelief in Hillbilly’s voice. “That’s it? ‘Okay’? I expected more resistance, to be honest.”

Haldane chuckles. “Well, you are right, just like you always are.” He shrugs. “How about breakfast, tomorrow at sunrise, just the two of us at the beach? My treat, of course.”

Hillbilly looks as taken aback by the change in conversation as Eugene feels. “What?”

“You, me, breakfast, beach, sunrise?” Haldane repeats, and there’s a twinkle of amusement in his eyes.

“Are you serious?” Hillbilly asks, still looking confused.

Now Haldane can’t help but laugh, and several heads turn around towards the two of them, curious as to what’s going on. “I’m always serious, Eddie. You want me to have more fun? Fine, I will.” Then he adds in a whisper, “If there’s one thing I enjoy doing in this god-forsaken place, then it’s spending time with you. And you’re right, lately we haven’t seen very much of each other outside of work, and here’s me trying to change that. So, Eddie Jones, will you do me the honor of sharing breakfast with me at sunrise tomorrow?”

Hillbilly ducks his head, and in the dying light of day it almost looks like he’s blushing. “Of course,” he says in a quiet voice, finally. "I'd love to."

It almost sounds like a date, Eugene thinks, but then the movie starts and he gets lost in it for a while. He’s enjoying himself much more than he thought he would, and so are Snafu and Burgin, judging by their loud laughs, cheers and jeers, depending on the scene. When he looks back at Hillbilly and Haldane after a while, he can’t help but smile. Haldane’s leaning against Hillbilly with his head resting on his shoulder and eyes closed in sleep. And instead of watching the movie, Hillbilly’s gazing down at Haldane with with a soft smile and eyes filled with warmth and something close to reverence. They look at peace, and Haldane finally seems relaxed, all his worry lines ceasing to exist in sleep. He looks younger that way, and it’s easy to imagine him at college, going to classes and living his life away from war. Eugene hopes Haldane can go back to that kind of life someday, and Hillbilly too.

Laughter erupts all around him and he turns his attention back to the movie where the female lead is just slapping her male co-star, probably for the second time in a row. He grins when Snafu shouts, “Yeah, that’s the way, lady!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, I'd like to thank everyone who's read this story and left a comment or kudos! I really appreciate it. :)
> 
> Secondly, this chapter is once again inspired by something Burgin wrote in his book. He talks about movie nights on Pavuvu which happened two to three times a week, helping to distract the Marines.


	4. Pavuvu – 25.08.1944

**4\. Pavuvu – 25.08.1944**

As the sun begins to creep towards the horizon, Eugene is sitting together with Burgin, Snafu and De L’Eau on one of Pavuvu’s beaches, enjoying one final night of peace before they and the rest of the 1st Marine Division will be heading out the following day to fight for a place called Peleliu that none of them have ever heard of before. Hillbilly had told them earlier that the higher-ups think it’s only going to take a couple of days, a week at most, to conquer the island, but the tone of his voice had suggested that he thought otherwise. And, as Eugene had learned soon after, so did most of his fellow veterans of Gloucester and Guadalcanal. It leaves him with a sinking feeling in his gut, finally realizing that this is real, that he’ll be heading into combat in a few days, and chances are he’s not going to make it out alive.

Staring at the waves, Eugene can’t help but think about Sid who’s been through two campaigns already and is probably home by now, safe and sound. He misses his best friend fiercely, though he’s glad that Sid will not face another enemy-infested island. He’s already been changed too much by the war for Eugene’s liking. There’s a certain kind of ruthlessness to Sid now that wasn’t there before, and Eugene doesn’t want to see his best friend lose his humanity, his soul, like his father thinks is bound to happen to every man going into combat.

Snafu elbows him in the side and, startled out of his thoughts, Eugene jumps and glares at him. “What?”

“Look who’s joining us,” Snafu smirks and nods towards the path that leads to the beach.

Eugene sees Haldane and Hillbilly, the latter with his trusted guitar slung on his back, walking towards them quietly, not talking at all. They seem calm but tense, and suddenly Eugene knows that the time before battle will always be scary, no matter how many campaigns a man has fought in before. He can see the worry in their eyes, though whether it is for their own lives or for the lives of their men, he doesn’t know. He guesses it’s more of the latter.

“Evening, boys,” Haldane greets them while Hillbilly simply nods. “Make sure you get plenty of sleep tonight. The boat won’t be nearly as comfortable as your tents here, and on Peleliu we’ll be lucky if we even manage to dig a foxhole. Enjoy the comforts of this place while you can.”

He smiles at them and they say, “Yes, sir,” in unison and watch Haldane and Hillbilly walk a little further away from them, before settling down in the sand themselves. Hillbilly starts tuning his guitar before he begins to pluck notes from her that are soon forming a melody which Eugene doesn’t know. Hillbilly isn’t singing, though, just letting the music speak for itself.

Staring back at the waves, Eugene and the others enjoy the private concert they are getting. It’s peaceful, sitting on the beach like this and being able to really appreciate the beauty of Pavuvu which is always there despite the land crabs, rats and rotting coconuts if one knows where to look. Hillbilly’s notes wash over them – until they suddenly stop.

“Andy?” Hillbilly asks, sounding confused, and Eugene can’t help but look over to them, curious.

“You have some sand there on your cheek,” Haldane says, hand already reaching towards Hillbilly. “May I?”

Hillbilly laughs and shrugs. “You’ve seen me looking a lot worse, Andy, but sure, if you’re bothered by a little bit of sand on my face, go ahead.”

Haldane settles his hand on Hillbilly’s cheek and brushes away the sand with his thumb in such a tender way that Hillbilly closes his eyes for a moment. There’s a faint smile and a look of utter contentment on his face, as if this moment, right now, is the most perfect thing that could possibly ever happen to him. Haldane’s eyes are soft and filled with warmth when he pulls his hand away and says, “There, all gone.”

Hillbilly stares at him for a long while, then shakes his head, still smiling. “Only you, Andy.”

Haldane chuckles. “Sing me something?” he asks.

“Of course,” is all Hillbilly says before he strums the first notes of _Amazing Grace_ , making Haldane’s eyes light up. It’s a very slow, reverent rendition of the song and the most beautiful one Eugene’s ever heard; and he knows it’s not meant for his ears, but for Haldane’s only, so he nudges Burgin next to him.

“Come on, let’s head to bed,” he says.

Silently, they make their way across the beach and back to their tent until Hillbilly’s quiet voice fades into the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, huge thanks to everyone who's reading this story and leaving kudos! 
> 
> This chapter marks the end of King's stay on Pavuvu. Late on August 26, 1944, the 1st Marine Division shipped out from Pavuvu, according to Burgin. The next chapter will deal with the journey to Peleliu.


	5. LST 661 – late August, early September 1944

**5\. LST 661 – late August, early September 1944**

The war suddenly seems a lot closer than it ever had on Pavuvu when they arrive at Guadalcanal for landing practices. They can all feel the mounting tension in the air and there’s something raw in the looks of the veterans of that battle whenever they gaze towards the shore. Their eyes look haunted and Eugene’s sure this place brings back a lot more bad memories than good ones. He thinks briefly of Sid and about what his best friend might have seen in this jungle or done to survive – he decides he doesn’t want to know and probably wouldn’t ever be able to understand.

Every day, they go out on LVTs and Higgins Boats to prepare for the assault on Peleliu. Mistakes are made by veterans and replacements alike, and they all learn from them, improving their routines with every practice landing. It’s tedious work and at the end of the day, Eugene’s always glad when they’re back on the LST and can rest. But he knows, no matter how hard the exercises may seem, the actual landing will be harder, and the days that follow even worse.

This morning, before the usual exercises began, several veterans of the Battle of Guadalcanal had requested to visit the cemetery to pay their respect to their fallen comrades. The request had been granted, and at the end of the day, while Eugene, Snafu and Burgin along with most of the Marines in King went back to the LST, Haldane and Hillbilly had gone ashore, joining several other veterans from various units on their trek to the cemetery. Eugene wonders how it must feel to walk those familiar paths through the jungle of an island that had been, essentially, a home for months, knowing that a lot of good men and many friends died conquering and defending it under dire circumstances.

When the veterans come back to the ship later that evening, it only takes one look for Eugene to see how harrowing being back on Guadalcanal had been for them. They are quiet, eyes downcast and sometimes reddened, and most of them disappear belowdecks to their cots as quickly as they can without talking to anyone. Among those few who linger on deck are Haldane and Hillbilly. They stand at the railing, leaning against it not far from where Eugene is standing himself, and stare out at sea with solemn expressions. Hillbilly especially looks shaken.

“You know it wasn’t your fault, right?” Haldane says quietly after a while as the skies darken around them.

Hillbilly scoffs. “Yeah, sure.”

Haldane turns around then and grabs his arm. “It’s the enemies’ fault, Eddie, the Jap’s and not yours. You did what you could that day, stupidly brave as you were, and you saved a lot of lives,” he tells him, eyes fierce.

“But not enough,” Hillbilly replies stubbornly. Eugene wonders if they’re talking about the day that earned Hillbilly his lieutenants’ bars. No one’s ever told him the whole story about Hillbilly’s deeds on Guadalcanal.

Haldane sighs softly, his grip softening. “Don’t go there, Eddie.”

“It’s just,” Hillbilly starts and rakes a nervous hand through his curls, “It’s bad enough as it is, having to lay a friend to rest in a place like this because I wasn’t fast enough, but I can’t stop thinking - what if the next time it’s you? I don’t ever want to have to visit your grave, Andy.”

He looks desperately at Haldane for a moment, before he lowers his eyes and stares at Haldane’s hand that has moved down his arm and settled on the back of Hillbilly’s.

“Some things are simply out of our hands, Eddie,” Haldane says in an honest voice, full of compassion. “I know that’s not what you want to hear, but I can’t promise you it won’t be me. I would be lying if I did. But no matter what happens, it will never be your fault, okay? I know that much.”

“I just want you to be safe,” Hillbilly whispers in a tone that makes something ache in Eugene’s chest. “I _need_ you to be safe, Andy.”

Haldane simply nods. “I know. I feel the same.”

They say nothing more after that, just stand side by side at the railing with Haldane’s hand lingering on Hillbilly’s in an attempt to comfort him and probably seek some comfort for himself. Eugene thinks back to the day Snafu told him that they would lose both Haldane and Hillbilly should one of them get hit, and after what he’s just seen, Eugene’s inclined to agree. There’s some kind of special bond between them that Eugene can’t explain and probably never will. He hopes with all his heart that it won’t come to an abrupt end on Peleliu, the last campaign Haldane and Hillbilly will have to face before they can go home and see their families again.

After Haldane squeezes Hillbilly’s hand one last time, the two of them share a glance and head below deck, probably to sleep and forget about the memories this day brought back. Eugene watches them leave, with Haldane guiding Hillbilly gently inside. He decides to stay on deck a little while longer, gazing up at the stars and quietly saying his prayers into the night, hoping they’ll be heard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another short snippet before we finally move onto Peleliu. I'd like to say thanks again to everyone leaving comments and kudos :)
> 
> Once again, this chapter is inspired by Burgin. He wrote in his books that the veterans of Guadalcanal wanted to visit the cemetery during the landing practices, which makes it likely that Andy and Eddie also went ashore.


	6. Peleliu – 15.09.1944

**6\. Peleliu – 15.09.1944**

Eugene’s never felt so exhausted and thirsty in his entire life. Looking around him he can see that his fellow Marines look just as beaten as he feels. It’s only their first day on Peleliu, but his two canteens are almost empty and so far no drinkable water is in sight. He’s seen the holes with dirty groundwater other Marines have gratefully used to fill their canteens with, but he’s not that thirsty yet that he’ll seriously consider drinking water which is bound to make him sick.

It doesn’t help that the sun is beating down on them relentlessly. Peleliu is hot and more than one Marine has already dropped out from heat stroke, dehydration or a combination of both. The whole landing has been a mess, first with another K Company from the 7th Marines getting mingled with their own on the beaches, and after that communication issues got K3/5 way in front of the other companies, putting them in an open and vulnerable position that makes everyone wary. Right now, they’re dug in as best as they can and wait for further orders. Dusk is falling and cools the island somewhat down, though not much. It’s still a relief to everyone.

They’re all sitting in their foxholes, rifles ready and too anxious to sleep since everyone expects the Japs to come at them with a surprise attack during the night. Despite their precarious position Haldane seems collected and calm, Eugene thinnks when he sees him moving between the foxholes and making sure his men are okay. He’s always on the move, though, not allowing himself a moment’s rest, continuously checking either on his Marines or the perimeter.

It’s Hillbilly who puts a stop to this. He’s been standing a little off to the side and observing Haldane’s movements for a while now until he finally intervenes. When Haldane passes him, Hillbilly touches his arm gently, making him stop in his tracks.

“Something wrong, Eddie?” Haldane asks him, sounding concerned.

Hillbilly raises an eyebrow and stares at him. “You need to sit down, Andy. Now. You’re driving me mad with all your running about.”

Haldane frowns at him. “I’m not ‘running about’. I’m making sure our position is as secure as it can be.”

“And is it?” Hillbilly challenges.

They stare at each other for a moment in the falling dusk, until Haldane’s shoulders fall and he lowers his gaze. “Yeah,” he admits quietly.

Hillbilly’s gaze softens and his hand strokes down Haldane’s arm once, before he suggests, “Then why don’t you sit down and get some rest, Andy? You’re pacing isn’t going to help anyone.”

Haldane nods and allows Hillbilly to guide him to the ground. They settle down next to each other and try to find a comfortable spot on the hard and jagged coral that Peleliu is made of. Hillbilly reaches to his hip where one of his canteens hangs and offers it to Haldane. “Here, drink something.”

Haldane stares at the canteen with the eyes of a parched man, but in the end he shakes his head. “I’m not thirsty.” Hillbilly gives him a skeptical look and Haldane relents, “I can’t. You need it yourself, Eddie.”

Hillbilly simply shoves the canteen into Haldane’s hand and Eugene almost chuckles at the surprised look on Haldane’s face. “I know your canteen’s empty. I still have some water to spare and right now, you need it more than I do.” He raises a dirty hand and lays it in one bold movement on Haldane’s forehead. “You’re hot,” he states.

Haldane manages a smirk as he unscrews the canteen. “Thank you,” he says.

Hillbilly rolls his eyes, removing his hand. “I didn’t mean it like that. Believe me, Andy, heat stroke is not an attractive look on anyone. Now drink.”

Dutifully, Haldane moves the canteen to his lips and drinks three precious gulps of water. Eugene’s sorely tempted to drink the last few drops in his own canteen when he sees the relieved look on Haldane’s face as the water soothes his dry throat.

“Better?” Hillbilly asks.

“Yes,” Haldane says, handing him back the canteen. “Thank you, Eddie.” He frowns when Hillbilly stows the canteen on his belt. “Won’t you drink any?”

Hillbilly shakes his head. “Nah, I’m not that thirsty. I just want to sleep.” Eugene knows Hillbilly is lying, can see it in the pinched look around his eyes and the way his dry lips have cracked. He’s surprised when Haldane doesn’t call him out on it.

“Then sleep, Eddie” Haldane says gently and Eugene can see him moving closer to Hillbilly, offering him his shoulder to lean against. “You’ve earned it.”

“You sure?” Hillbilly asks. “I can stay awake if you want to rest first.”

Haldane nods. “I’m sure. Get some sleep.”

“Okay, then,” Hillbilly says after a moment of thought and leans his head against Haldane’s shoulder. His features relax and he lets out a quiet sigh.

Someone sleeping on their foxhole buddy’s shoulder is not an unusual sight, Eugene knows, especially when the only other option is laying down on hard, jagged coral rock. Seeing the soft smile on Haldane’s face, however, is. He’s staring at Hillbilly as if he’s something precious that needs to be treasured. There’s a hint of sadness in his smile as well, although Eugene has no idea what it’s for.

He looks away when Hillbilly curls in on himself, turning towards Haldane and resting one of his hands on Haldane’s leg unconsciously. Closing his own eyes, Eugene tries to get some sleep as well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have another chapter in honor of Andy Haldane's birthday today :)


	7. Peleliu Airfield – 16.09.1944

**7\. Peleliu Airfield – 16.09.1944**

Eugene is almost too ashamed to admit he’s been scared when they took the airfield. Landing on that beach had been more horrible than he had imagined and going across the airfield had been even worse. Now he knew why Sid had wanted him to stay at home, to never join the Marines or any other military outfit, to simply stay safe. Now he knew why his father had tried everything to make him stay, why he’d talked about souls being torn out. Today, Eugene had seen things beyond imagination, things he very much wishes he could forget but knows he never will.

It’s Haldane and Hillbilly who finally put his mind to rest, make it stop repeating horrible image after horrible image, make him smile. Eugene feels better knowing that he’s not the only one scared out of his mind, that even veterans like Haldane and Hillbilly feel fear. He realizes that for them it’s must be even worse, in a way, because the lives of their men depend on the decisions they make and sometimes those decisions lead to more letters Captain Haldane will have to write home to anxious families. Not for all the money or glory or honor in the world would Eugene want to be in their shoes.

His mind is finally shutting down, letting him catch his breath. Haldane is about to leave, telling them to rest. He’s turning away, only to remember the spare helmet in his hand that Gunny Haney had given him moments before. With tired, itching eyes Eugene watches as Haldane gives the helmet to Hillbilly and says, “Thought you might need that.”

It’s when Hillbilly nods, says, “Thank you, sir,” and takes the helmet, looking down at it in an oddly shy way, that Eugene feels once more like he’s intruding on a private moment. He finds himself unable to look away, though, and watches as Haldane pats Hillbilly’s arm once and leaves. Hillbilly’s eyes follow him, track his movements, and he’s looking wistful. His sigh is so quiet Eugene almost doesn’t hear it.

Then Hillbilly shakes his head and it appears to Eugene as if he can’t quite believe what an extraordinary man Haldane is and what he’s possibly done in his life so far to deserve to be at his side. Eugene knows the feeling. After a moment, Hillbilly breaks the silence, telling them about that time Haldane’s got him his battlefield commission. “Seems like a thousand years ago now,” he says and there’s a faraway look in his eyes. Eugene doesn’t know what Hillbilly remembers, hasn’t been with them on Guadalcanal and Cape Gloucester, but once more he wishes he had, if just to see how this companionship between Haldane and Hillbilly had started.

He’s surprised when Hillbilly tells him he’s done well that day, and feels oddly proud because praise from Hillbilly feels a lot like praise from his father. When Hillbilly assures him that he’ll be alright Eugene can’t help but believe him. As long as someone has faith in him and his abilities when he himself is on the brink of giving up, he knows he can go forward.

Hillbilly leaves them then and Eugene watches him follow Haldane’s footsteps until he reaches Haldane’s side and eases himself down next to him in the dim light. They’re not too far away and since no one around him feels the urge to talk after the day they’ve had, Eugene dimly hears Hillbilly say, “You should get some sleep, too, Andy.”

Eugene closes his eyes and gets comfortable. He can hear the smile in his voice when Haldane answers, “You sound like a nagging housewife, Eddie.”

With a huff, Hillbilly replies, “If I were a nagging housewife, I’d tell you to do your manly duty and make me a happy woman instead of getting some rest.”

Eugene’s eyes snap open when he hears that. Burgin and Snafu are staring back at him, just as wide-eyed and disbelieving. Haldane, however, is snorting with laughter. “Why, Eddie, I never knew you felt that way about me.”

“Sure you do,” Hillbilly drawls. “I show you every day and I know you’re not blind.”

Haldane is smiling now and his eyes have softened. “I suppose you do. So, what do you say we just leave and elope? Canada is supposed to be nice this time of year.”

Now it’s Hillbilly’s turn to laugh. Above Eugene, lying on some concrete, Snafu groans. “I swear,” he says, “this is like watching your parents flirt. It’s disgusting. Utterly disgusting. I’ll never get those images out of my head. Thank you very much for that.”

Hillbilly must have heard him. “Sorry, Andy,” he says, “maybe next time. You’re scaring the kids. Wouldn’t want them to get abandonment issues, now would we?”

“Of course not,” Haldane says and Eugene can see him shuffling around, trying to get comfortable on the hard floor. “Goodnight, boys,” he wishes, and, a bit quieter he says, “Goodnight, Eddie.”

“Sleep well,” Hillbilly replies just as quietly with a fond tone in his voice.

Silence settles over the bombed out building and even though Eugene knows they’re just joking around, he can’t help but feel that there has been some truth to what Hillbilly’s said. He does show Haldane every day how much he respects and appreciates him, sometimes in grand gestures, sometimes in small things. And, as his mother has always told him, it is the small things in life that matter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this was the first chapter I wrote for this story, a couple of months ago. It's obviously inspired by the series and just my take on my favorite scene. There's just something about the way Eddie looks at Andy when Andy gives him the helmet that gets me every time I watch it. It's such a beautiful moment between them :)


	8. Peleliu – 01.10.1944

**8\. Peleliu – 01.10.1944**

So much for obtaining Peleliu in a week, much less three days, Eugene thinks. They’ve been on this island of coral rock for almost three weeks now with no end to the fighting in sight. In fact, Eugene has a feeling that it’s only going to get worse the longer they stay. Everyone’s on edge, especially during the night. Just a week ago, when they were headed to the Umurbrogol, one of their own men had been accidentally shot at night because someone thought he was a Jap. Then there was the disaster with the guy handling the war dog on Hillbilly’s patrol about a week after they had landed on Peleliu. Someone had hit him with deadly force with an entrenching tool when the man wouldn’t stop screaming after he had a nightmare. Accidents like that keep happening everywhere, Eugene’s been told, but it doesn’t make him feel better. It’s like the Japs are turning the Marines against themselves with their banzai charges and night attacks, making everyone nervous, jumpy and, consequently, dangerous.

They’ve already lost enough good men without them killing each other. 3rd Battalion had landed on Peleliu with about a thousand men – now maybe 700 were left. This morning, King had headed into the Pocket and ended the day with five killed and fifteen wounded. It’s the most losses they’ve had so far on Peleliu, not counting the various walking wounded, Hillbilly among them.

Eugene glances over to his left where Hillbilly is trying to dig a foxhole, having trouble getting a proper grip on the handle of his shovel. Blood is slowly dripping down his hand, but he ignores it and keeps working while the sun starts to set in the distance. They don’t have much time to secure their position until darkness falls, bringing with it more night attacks by the Japs. Eugene goes back to digging his own hole together with Snafu. They work in silence, each concentrated on his task and they make good progress in the dying light.

“Eddie, what happened?”

Startled out of his mind-numbing work, Eugene looks up and sees Haldane standing next to Hillbilly’s foxhole, worry etched into his face.

“Huh?” Hillbilly says, wiping sweat from his brow and leaving an ugly red smear behind.

Haldane grabs his hand and looks at it carefully. “You’re hurt.”

“Oh, that.” Hillbilly shrugs. “It’s nothing, really.”

“It doesn’t look like nothing, Eddie,” Haldane says with a raised eyebrow. “What happened?”

Hillbilly stares at his hand, still being held gently by Haldane’s own, and shrugs once more. “Earlier, when we were exploring the Pocket, I thought I heard something and held my hand up to signal for the others to stop. I was just turning around when the Japs started shooting. One bullet hit my hand.”

“Why didn’t you go see a corpsman?” Haldane asks, still inspecting the wound.

“There hadn’t been time,” Hillbilly says unapologetically. “And there were people in real need of medical attention, Andy. It’s just a glancing shot, anyway. I’ll be fine.”

Haldane seems to disagree. “You’re hurt.” He calls for a corpsman and a moment later, Doc Caswell is there. He spots Hillbilly’s wound right away and gets to work while Hillbilly holds out his hand obediently, if slightly impatient.

“This looks worse than it is,” Caswell says after a moment, pulling a bandage out of his bag. “It’s not deep enough to require stitches and should heal fine, provided you keep it clean and change the bandage every day. Think you can do that, Lieutenant?”

Hillbilly rolls his eyes. “I’ll try to stay out of the dirt, doc.”

Caswell grins up at him. “Good man.”

He cleans the wound with some water and wraps the hand tightly in a white bandage that stands out against Hillbilly’s dirty skin. “Anything else I can do for you, sirs?” Haldane shakes his head and Caswell nods at them. “Take care.”

“See?” Hillbilly says once Caswell has gone. “I’ve told you it’s nothing.”

Haldane rolls his eyes. “You were bleeding. I wouldn’t call that nothing. You need to take better care of yourself, Eddie.”

“I thought I’ve got you for that,” Hillbilly says with a playful smirk.

“Wasn’t it the other way round?” Haldane smiles.

Hillbilly grins back. “Let’s call it a team effort, then.”

Haldane sits down next to him in the mostly finished foxhole as night is slowly creeping over the ridges of the Umurbrogol. He takes Eddie’s hand back in his and strokes gently over the bandages. “It hurts, doesn’t it?”

After a quiet moment, Hillbilly nods. “Yes. Of course it does. It’s not as bad as the sores from the jungle rot on Cape Gloucester, though.”

Haldane chuckles at that and, insanely, Eugene wishes he knew what they’re talking about from experience and not just stories he’s heard here and there. “Yeah, those sores were something to behold, weren’t they? Makes me almost appreciate the hot temperatures here.”

“Dry and hot is at least slightly better than being constantly wet,” Hillbilly agrees. “At least, when there’s enough drinking water around.”

They fall silent, sitting comfortably next to each other and eating the Marine Corps’ sorry excuse for dinner. Eugene takes one look at his own trades it wordlessly with Snafu’s.

“Think we’ll get any sleep tonight?” Hillbilly asks after he finishes his meal.

Haldane shakes his head. “Seeing how today went, I don’t think tonight will go any better. You should sleep while you can.”

“What about you?”

Haldane shrugs. “Maybe tomorrow.”

“Andy …” Hillbilly sighs. “Come on, I know you. With King being sent into this hellhole today, you were too busy with preparations to get any sleep last night. Let me take first watch.”

“But you’re hurt,” Haldane protests weakly.

Eugene knows it won’t get him far. He’s proven right when Hillbilly rolls his eyes. “My hand is hurt, Andy. My eyes are just fine. Just get some sleep.” When Haldane looks like he wants to object again, he adds a quiet, “Please?”

Haldane sighs in defeat, and Eugene knows that Hillbilly has won. “Fine. But you wake me in two hours, if the Japs haven’t attacked by then.”

“Promise,” Hillbilly grins, but his eyes are soft as he watches Haldane settle against his shoulder. “Sleep well,” he whispers, grabbing his rifle with his good hand and staring out into the almost impenetrable darkness that has fallen around them.

It’s only when Eugene settles down for sleep in his own foxhole next to Snafu that he realizes that Haldane has never let go of Hillbilly’s bandaged hand.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry for the long delay in updating. I've started work my PhD thesis this month and was also busy with preparing and submitting my first paper to a journal, so I had a lot going on. Hopefully this chapter will somewhat make up for the wait. It's more or less based on real events. In "Brotherhood of Heroes" by Bill Sloan it's mentioned that Eddie hurt his left hand early in October. It's stated that it was a bullet wound, though not how he got it exactly. So the scenario in this story was something I made up that hopefully sounds somewhat plausible.


	9. Peleliu Hills – 10.10.1944

**9\. Peleliu Hills – 10.10.1944**

When he’s selected as stretcher bearer Eugene thinks he’s found the worst possible job on the planet. When he realizes the stretcher he’s carrying is for Hillbilly, he knows. Hillbilly looks shocked and in pain and Eugene sees a huge area red with blood on the side of his chest. He stops short in his tracks when Hillbilly looks up at him and puts on a brave face, trying to reassure him that he’ll be fine even though his wound obviously hurts like hell. Any other guy would cry or scream or pray, Eugene thinks, but Hillbilly is still very much their lieutenant and taking care of them first before he deals with his own troubles.

Eugene wants nothing more than to cry for that selfless man who always puts others first, even when he’s painfully wounded. Instead, he helps get Hillbilly on the stretcher, eliciting muffled sounds of pain from him in the process and hating himself for making Hillbilly suffer even more. They stagger down the rocky hillside, still under fire, and Eugene is acutely aware that they have to get Hillbilly out of here, fast, when he slips, loses his footing and falls, taking the other bearer and the stretcher down with him. His heart stops when he hears a loud thud, knowing without looking that Hillbilly has fallen from the stretcher and probably wounded himself further. Eugene turns around and sees him curled up around his wound on the ground, eyes tightly closed and breathing heavily. Before he can move to help him up, a shot whizzes past and embeds itself into the stretcher where Hillbilly was lying just a moment earlier. Eugene’s heart stops when he realizes what that probably would have meant if he hadn’t stumbled. For a moment he just stands there, out in the open, frozen in place, until he hears Haldane holler at them to get Hillbilly to safety.

He shakes the shock off, and, as fast as they can, they get Hillbilly back on the stretcher and down the hill to where Haldane is waiting for them. Somehow, Eugene can’t stop thinking about the fact that he had never heard Haldane raise his voice like that before, filled with barely concealed panic. He thinks back to Snafu’s words on Pavuvu and just knows that Snafu had been right: If Hillbilly had taken that second bullet today, Haldane would have been destroyed along with him.

He thanks every god he knows for letting him stumble, for saving their lieutenant. They set the stretcher down behind the rock where Haldane and Burgin are situated and catch their breaths. Doc Caswell comes running up to them and kneels down beside Hillbilly, checking him all over before focusing his attention on the bleeding wound. Eugene watches silently as the corpsman wipes the blood away to get a better look at the wound.

So far, Hillbilly has been quiet but when Caswell gets out a pair of tweezers from his bag and plunges them into the wound in search for the bullet, Hillbilly lets out a scream that chills Eugene to the bones. Before anyone can react, Haldane is at Hillbilly’s side, grabbing both his hands in his and holding them gently.

“Hey, Eddie, look at me, alright? Just look at me,” he says quietly in a voice that calms Eugene immediately even though he isn’t the one being spoken to.

When Hillbilly opens his eyes and looks up at Haldane, he lets out a broken, “Andy.”

“I’m here,” Haldane immediately reassures him. “I’m not going anywhere and neither are you. The doc’s just got to do his thing and you’ll be right as rain.”

Eugene can see the death grip with which Hillbilly is holding onto Haldane. His face is scrunched up in pain and when he blinks the tears spill over and leave clean tracks in his otherwise grimy face. “It hurts,” he whispers.

Haldane frees one of his hands and cups the right side of Hillbilly’s face gently while lowering his head and bringing them closer together. From watching his father work on patients all his life Eugene knows that Haldane is trying to make himself the only thing Hillbilly sees, the only thing he can focus on, to take his attention away from the pain.

“I know, Eddie,” he says quietly. “I know it hurts but it will be over soon, okay? Doc’s just got to find the bullet and then he’ll get some morphine into you and the pain will be gone.” Haldane briefly glances at the corpsman. “How much longer, doc?”

“I almost got it,” Caswell says without looking up.

Haldane looks back at Hillbilly and smiles reassuringly at him. “You hear that? Doc’s almost done.”

The look Hillbilly gives Haldane makes something clench painfully in Eugene’s chest. “I don’t want to die here. Andy, please, I don’t want to die before we – before I even get the chance to-“

“Shhh,” Haldane hushes him, leaning his forehead against Hillbilly’s. “You won’t die. I promised to take you home and meet your parents and siblings, haven’t I? And you know I don’t go back on my promises.”

Hillbilly nods, before letting out another blood-curdling scream when Caswell pulls out the tweezers and holds them up triumphantly. “Got it!”

Haldane turns his head to him and says in a tight voice, “Then give him some morphine, will you?”

Caswell immediately does and once the morphine hits his system, Hillbilly’s features relax visibly and Eugene feels like he can finally breathe again.

“That better, Eddie?” Haldane asks.

“Yes,” Hillbilly sighs, but he doesn’t let go of Haldane’s hand.

Haldane smiles softly at him before he looks once more at Caswell. “How is he, doc?”

Caswell stops bandaging the wound for a moment to look at Haldane. “He’ll be fine.” Eugene could swear the whole company present let out a breath in unison they hadn’t known they were holding. “The bullet nicked part of his rib, but I got the fragment out. As far as I can see it didn’t hit any major organs, so while he’ll be in a lot of pain for a while, he’ll be just fine in a couple of weeks.”

“Does he need to go to a hospital?” Haldane asks.

Before Caswell can say anything, Hillbilly whispers harshly, “No, I want to stay. I need to stay. Don’t send me away, Andy.”

Caswell raises one eyebrow at his patient, before he says drily, “A trip to the aid station to properly clean up and dress the wound should suffice, I think, if you’re so desperate to stay in this hellhole. But with a wound like that, you’re not going back into battle, so don’t even think about going AWOL.”

Without waiting for a reply, Caswell gets some guys together to carry the stretcher all the way back to the airfield where the aid station is located. When they lift Hillbilly up, Haldane reluctantly lets go of his hands. “I’ll see you tonight, Eddie, alright?”

“Stay safe,” Eddie whispers, already drowsing from the morphine now that he doesn’t have to be strong anymore.

Haldane nods. “I will.”

They watch him go for a moment before they realize there’s still a fight going on, other people getting hurt or worse, and Haldane orders them back to their positions. Eugene fervently hopes that someone’s bullet hits the guy who almost cost Hillbilly his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, a big thank you to everyone who's reading this story and leaving kudos! I hope you enjoy this chapter as well!


	10. Peleliu – 12.10.1944

**10\. Peleliu – 12.10.1944**

It’s only two days later that Eugene’s heart stops for a second time when someone shouts, “Ack-Ack’s been hit!” Hillbilly isn’t back with them yet since the doctor at the aid station decided he won’t be fit for combat for quite some time, and right now, without knowing how badly Haldane got hit, Eugene is glad Hillbilly’s not here to witness this. He doesn’t think he could take Hillbilly’s grief on top of his own, should Haldane be carried down the hill on a stretcher, motionless.

Anxiously, Eugene waits for something to happen. It takes agonizingly long for a corpsman to run past him and up the slope. Just before Eugene loses sight of him the corpsman, who turns out to be Doc Caswell, stops suddenly, and then Haldane is rounding the corner, with Burgin supporting him. Caswell puts Haldane’s other arm around his shoulders and together they manage to get down the hill without further incident. As they get closer, Eugene can see that the whole left side of Haldane’s face is bloody. He doesn’t want to think about how all that blood came to be there.

Burgin and Caswell lower Haldane down to the ground not too far from Eugene and Haldane promptly throws up. “Concussion,” Caswell says, waiting until Haldane is finished before he carefully wipes the blood on his face away. A deep, bloody graze appears around the area of Haldane’s left temple and Eugene feels like throwing up himself.

“You’re one lucky man, captain,” Caswell says as he starts cleaning the wound.

“Don’t feel so lucky right now,” Haldane mumbles and Eugene winces in sympathy. The graze looks painful and stands out against Haldane’s otherwise pale face.

“Well, you are,” Caswell says, getting some bandages out of his bag. “It’s a deep bullet graze, giving you one hell of a headache and a concussion, but in the end it’s just that: a graze. Just a little further to the left and you would have been dead. Now you’ll just have to deal with nausea, headaches and feeling off balance for a couple of days. If you ask me, you have been very lucky.”

Haldane nods and then winces when the motion aggravates his injury. What little color he’s had left in his face drains away. “I guess I’m very lucky, then.” He looks towards the men, saying, “We’re done here for today, boys. Let’s head back to the airfield. It’s getting dark anyway.”

They get a stretcher for him so Haldane doesn’t have to walk the long distance and carry him back to one of the bombed out buildings of the airfield where the aid station is set up. Eugene pointedly does not think about how differently their return could have been today, if that bullet had taken a slightly different path.

When they come closer, Eugene spots Hillbilly standing outside the aid station, waiting for them to get back. He can see the exact moment when Hillbilly realizes who is lying on the stretcher, and Eugene’s heart drops into his stomach when he realizes how it all must look from the outside. Hillbilly’s face loses all color and he staggers a step forward before he has to grip a half-collapsed wall for support.

Without thinking about it, Eugene gives his equipment to Snafu and breaks formation, running up ahead toward Hillbilly. The closer he gets the better he sees how hard Hillbilly is trying to keep his emotions in check. Eugene stops in front of him, breathing heavily, and says, “It’s alright, sir, he’s alright.”

Hillbilly stares at him for a moment, all wild, desperate blue eyes. He grips Eugene’s shoulder hard. “Don’t lie to me, Sledge.”

“I’m not,” Eugene reassures him and it feels so weird to be the one offering comfort for once. “A bullet grazed him at the temple and caused a nasty concussion. He’s only on a stretcher because his balance is off and it was easier and faster to get him back here that way.”

Hillbilly keeps staring at him and Eugene tries to be as calm and confident for him as Hillbilly had been for them these last few weeks since they landed on Peleliu. It must have worked, for Hillbilly breathes out slowly, lets go of his shoulder and says with a voice that is shaking slightly, “Okay.”

Together, they await the arrival of the rest of the company and even if Eugene’s words had not been enough to put Hillbilly at ease, the fact that Haldane is neither covered with a blanket nor rushed inside the aid station in a hurry is. The stretcher bearers stop in front of the entrance where Hillbilly and Eugene are standing and gently put the stretcher down. The rest of the company settles down in the near vicinity, trying to give Haldane and Hillbilly a shred of privacy. Eugene joins Snafu, Burgin and De L’Eau who are sitting just a couple of feet away. Snafu nods at him as he hands back Eugene’s equipment.

When Eugene turns around he sees Hillbilly kneeling beside Haldane even though the position must aggravate the wound in his side. He carefully cards a shaking hand through Haldane’s hair above the bandage and chokes out, “Oh god, Andy.”

Haldane’s eyes open. “Hey. How’re you holding up?”

Hillbilly laughs incredulously. To Eugene it sounds more like a suppressed sob. “How am I holding up? I’m not the one with a bullet hole in my head.”

“It’s just a graze,” Haldane mumbles. “Apparently I’m lucky.”

“Of course you are,” Hillbilly agrees, sounding wrecked, “but someday your luck may run out. You promised me you’d stay safe, Andy. You told me you’d never break a promise.”

Haldane stares at him for a moment, taking in how shaken Hillbilly looks. Reaching for the hand that isn’t currently carding through his hair he presses it down against his chest, just above his heart. “See?” he says, voice quiet. “It’s still beating. I’m here, Eddie, and I’m not going anywhere.”

Hillbilly looks on the verge of tears as he nods and Eugene wants to look away, wants the whole company to get up and leave, because they have no right to be here, to witness this moment between their COs. When Haldane’s thumb starts to gently stroke the back of Hillbilly’s hand which is still resting over his heart reassuringly, Eugene tears his eyes away and purposefully looks towards the horizon.

“Don’t ever do that to me again,” he hears Hillbilly whisper. “I wouldn’t know what to do without you.”

Two days, Eugene thinks, and they had come more than close to losing their best officers. He desperately hopes their luck won’t run out until they leave this godforsaken island.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the kudos I got for the last chapter! This chapter is the last one set on Peleliu. The following chapters will deal with Andy and Eddie's recuperation on Pavuvu, bevor we move on to Okinawa (and more heartbreak).


	11. USS Sea Runner – 27.10.1944

**11\. USS Sea Runner – 27.10.1944**

About two weeks after Haldane and Hillbilly have been wounded, King Company is relieved and boarding the USS Sea Runner that will take them back to Pavuvu, their numbers severely decimated. They have lost good men on Peleliu, some to stress, some to injury and more than Eugene cares to think about to eternity. The few who have made it, who are still with them, look like they have been through hell and back. A lot of them are injured in some way. Many, like Haldane and Hillbilly, are walking wounded and not fit for combat anymore.

Looking around him, Eugene can only shake his head at the sorry sight his fellow Marines present. Their hopes had been so high before they landed on Peleliu, thinking it would only take them a few days to take the island, maybe a week tops if one was particularly pessimistic. Now, four weeks later parts of Peleliu are still under Japanese control and King Company is nothing but a shadow of what it used to be.

No one looks back when they leave. They make their way slowly across the airfield to the beaches they had landed upon just a couple of weeks ago. Eugene now gets why Hillbilly had thought his battlefield commission seemed like a lifetime ago. He can’t quite believe that it has only been a month since they’ve landed on Orange Beach Two, since the fight for Peleliu began. It could as well have been a year, judging by how old Eugene feels now, how weary and tired he is.

Just in front of him, Haldane and Hillbilly are walking side by side, one supporting the other. Eugene knows Haldane is still hit by dizzy spells and moments of disorientation and loss of balance, after-effects from his concussion, while Hillbilly has trouble staying on his feet for longer periods of time because each step and deep breath is making his wound throb. He marvels at the strength of these two men who wouldn’t let themselves be evacuated even though they had every reason to.

When King reaches the deck of the ship that will bring them back to Pavuvu, leaving the fighting behind but not the horror and the pain it brought, Burgin immediately scrounges up some blankets and lays them down in a shaded spot before he motions Haldane and Hillbilly over. Eugene steps up to them and helps Hillbilly settle down, leaning against a wall. “Here you go, sir.”

“Thank you, Sledgehammer,” Hillbilly says. He lets out a relieved sigh and relaxes slightly, closing his eyes briefly. Haldane sits down next to him, slowly and careful not to lose his balance.

“Do you need anything else, sirs?” Burgin asks them.

Haldane starts to shake his head, thinks about it and then decides against it. “No,” he says instead, “we’re good. Get some rest, boys. You’ve earned it.”

Burgin nods and sits down a few feet to the right of him, between Eugene and Snafu. They’re sitting in the sun, enjoying the warmth and the way the light breeze caresses their faces. For the first time in four weeks Eugene feels like he’s finally able to breathe again. He’s made it. He can’t quite believe it, but somehow he’s made it.

It’s quiet for a while on deck, until the ships’ engines are starting up and they’re moving out. Everyone’s exhausted and too tired to go down belowdecks to sort out their quarters, and most of them are asleep as soon as they’re sitting down. Eugene’s already drowsing when he hears Hillbilly’s worried voice to the left of him say, “You alright there, Andy?”

Eugene cracks his eyes open and looks over to them. There’s a strained look on Haldane’s face, and he’s pale and breathing heavily through his nose.

“Not really,” he forces out. “I feel like I’m going to throw up any moment now. It’s the damn ship.”

Eugene sympathizes with him. Having a concussion is anything but fun, as he knows from personal experience, but having a concussion while being on a ship must be hell. He knows Haldane will have some rough days ahead of him. The look on Hillbilly’s face is compassionate for a moment, and then he smiles at Haldane.

“C’mere,” he murmurs, holding his right arm up invitingly.

Haldane stares at him for a moment, clearly tempted, before his gaze falls to the white bandages peeking out from underneath Hillbilly’s uniform. “Your wound …”

“… will be fine,” Hillbilly says, with a hint of fond impatience in his voice.

And it’s a testament to how much they trust each other when Haldane doesn’t argue and instead simply settles down with his head on Hillbilly’s shoulder and closes his eyes. Hillbilly’s arm is pulling Haldane against him, grounding him enough for Haldane to lose the pallor on his face even though the ship keeps on sailing across the waves.

“Isn’t that better?” Hillbilly mumbles sleepily, his own eyes closing, and it’s so quiet Eugene almost doesn’t catch it.

Haldane smiles in response. “Yes.”

As silence settles once more over the ship, Eugene falls asleep to the sound of crashing waves and seabirds wailing, glad to leave that horrible island that cost so many good men their lives as far behind him as possible.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another short chapter. The journey on the USS Sea Runner from Peleliu to Pavuvu took, according to Burgin, six days. They actually boarded the Sea Runner via Higgins Boats and climbed up nets to reach the deck, but I really couldn't see Andy and Eddie doing that with their injuries, so I left that out. The next three chapters will be set on Pavuvu before we move on to Okinawa, though it's possible I might add another Pavuvu chapter. So far, 20 chapters are completed and I can say that this story will contain at least 22 chapters, possibly more. 
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed the last chapter and will enjoy this one as well. Thanks to everyone for leaving kudos!


	12. Pavuvu – Early November 1944

**12\. Pavuvu – Early November 1944**

They’re back on Pavuvu and things are looking up again. Eugene still feels the loss of so many good men, they all do, but on Pavuvu it’s easier to remember that there are things in the world worth fighting for than it was on Peleliu. Eugene spends his days in the sun with Burgin and Snafu, sometimes sitting under palm trees, sometimes lying at the beach and gazing up at the sky until it gets dark. Some evenings, they are joined by Haldane and Hillbilly, both looking healthier than when they’d arrived on Pavuvu. Eugene knows their wounds are still bothering them, although they try not to let it show. Especially Hillbilly still has trouble staying on his feet for more than a couple of hours without his breathing getting labored, but all in all they’re on the mend.

Most times, Hillbilly has his guitar with him when he and Haldane go down to the beach to be with their men. Eugene is always looking forward to those nights, for while Hillbilly doesn’t sing because taking deep breaths is still too painful for him, the notes he plucks from his guitar are magical enough. Someone always knows the song he’s playing and will start singing along to it, and soon others join in until the whole beach is singing in chorus. Eugene loves those times when his mind narrows down to song lyrics and melodies, when everyone looks at ease and younger than they have in a long time.

This evening, however, neither Haldane nor Hillbilly come down to the beach and the men turn in earlier than usual. It’s just not the same, singing together without the notes of Hillbilly’s slightly out-of-tune guitar. Eugene lingers longer than the rest, simply enjoying the sounds of the waves rolling against the shore for a few minutes, remembering the day he and Sid had been here. It seems so long ago now. When he finally makes his way up to the barracks, a major comes towards him with some papers in his hands.

“Private,” he says and Eugene salutes. “Remind Captain Haldane that I need the report of his shooting on my desk by tomorrow evening.”

“I will, sir,” Eugene says.

The major wishes him a good night and leaves. Even though it’s getting dark it’s not too late to go by Haldane’s barrack to deliver the message, so Eugene makes a right and follows the path that leads to the area where the officers of the Third Battalion are located. There’s still a light on in the little hut Haldane calls his home and Eugene is about to when he hears Hillbilly’s voice. Hand raised midair, he stops in his tracks.

“You really should get some rest, Andy. I know your head’s troubling you. I can see it.”

Haldane lets out a low chuckle. “Nagging me again, are you?”

“Well,” Hillbilly says, sounding rather indignant, “somebody has to take care of you if you won’t do it yourself.”

Eugene is acutely aware of the fact that he’s eavesdropping in on his two commanding officers but he can’t stop himself. Instead of leaving, he peers through the door. Haldane is sitting at his desk, probably writing the very same report Eugene’s here to remind him of while Hillbilly lounges on the ground, with his back against Haldane’s cot and legs stretched out in front of him, absentmindedly plucking the strings of his guitar quietly.

“I really have to finish this, Eddie,” Haldane says, rubbing his eyes tiredly. “I’m already pushing the deadline. The major will have my hide if I don’t get this to him by tomorrow.”

“Yes,” Hillbilly agrees, “by tomorrow evening. There’ll be enough time to finish the last two pages after you’ve had a good night’s rest.”

Haldane sighs and rubs his temples. After a moment of contemplating his written words, he puts the unfinished report away. “You’re probably right.”

Hillbilly smirks at him. “I’m always right.”

“Now, don’t get cocky,” Haldane says, pointing a finger at him but he’s smiling. He moves over to his cot and tousles up Hillbilly’s hair before he unties his shoes and lies down. Hillbilly just rolls his eyes at him.

“Do you want me to sing you a goodnight song?” Hillbilly asks in a tone that’s probably supposed to be teasing. To Eugene, however, it sounds a lot more like an honest offer.

Haldane regards Hillbilly for a moment, before he says, “I’d like that, as long as you think you’re up for it. Don’t aggravate your wound because of me.”

“I’m sure I’ll be alright,” Hillbilly says, staring at Haldane with a look in his eyes Eugene can’t quite decipher. “But it’ll probably sound even more off-key than usual. It’s been so long since I’ve sung anything. I’m horribly out of practice.”

Haldane moves to lie on his side and squeezes Hillbilly’s shoulder gently. “Don’t talk like that about yourself. You know I love hearing you sing.”

“Yeah, well, there’s obviously something wrong with your ears, then,” Hillbilly murmurs, but he starts playing anyway, some quiet, slow song that fills the silence in the room. When he finally starts to sing, Eugene has to admit that it is a little too breathy and off-key, just like his guitar is a little out of tune, too. They’ve both been through a lot, Hillbilly and his beloved guitar, but Haldane closes his eyes and smiles as if he’s never heard anything more beautiful.

Quietly, Eugene steps backwards, away from the door and into the night. There’s no need to destroy the moment with a message Haldane doesn’t need, anyway. Eugene knows he’ll get the report done in time, whether or not Eugene reminds him of it, so he walks away, letting Haldane get his much needed rest. Hillbilly’s quiet voice follows him into the night for a few steps before it fades and is lost in the distance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the kudos I got for the last chapter! And special thanks to Melster518 for the comment! Maybe I should have mentioned at the beginning that this story will have a happy ending XD Seeing Andy and Eddie die in the series always rips my heart out every single time I watch the show. No need to torture myself further by writing about it. ^^ 
> 
> Speaking of that: Andy Haldane died 70 years ago today, aged 27, while Eddie's death was two days ago, also aged 27. :(


	13. Pavuvu – Mid-November 1944

**13\. Pavuvu – Mid-November 1944**

It’s been two weeks since Peleliu and Eugene finds himself back at the mess tent with Burgin and Snafu after their fourth day of training for the next battle they know will come. They’re joined by Jay De L’Eau this time and talk about anything and nothing at all. Without thinking about it, Eugene scoops up a spoonful of rice and drops it on Snafu’s plate. Burgin grins at him and continues to eat his own portion. Peleliu brought them closer together, made Eugene truly a part of their group and he feels more connected to these men than to anyone back home, except maybe Sid, because he knows that Sid will always be his best friend.

He looks up when Haldane enters the mess tent, closely followed by Hillbilly. They get their own chow and sit down at a table across from them. “Boys,” Haldane greets them while Hillbilly nods. They greet back and mind their own business, except Eugene can’t help but notice how tired Haldane looks. Not physically tired, he thinks, more mentally tired. With only half an ear he listens to one of Snafu’s stories about the shit he used to get up to in the bayous back home. His main attention is focused on the topic Haldane and Hillbilly are talking about. It’s eerily similar to a conversation he’s witnessed just a couple of months ago, after he first arrived on Pavuvu.

“There’s no need to inhale your food, Andy. It won’t run away, you know?” Hillbilly says wryly with a raised eyebrow. When Haldane doesn’t slow down, Hillbilly reaches out a hand and places it gently on top of Haldane’s. “Stop, Andy. You really need to stop.”

Haldane looks up then, and Eugene can’t see his face, but there is sympathy in Hillbilly’s eyes. “I can’t,” Haldane says quietly. “There’s still so much to do, Eddie, so many words to write. Their mothers back home deserve more than a ‘Your son died heroically while fighting for his country”-letter. They deserve more than pre-written words where only the name changes with each letter that goes out.”

“I know,” Hillbilly says. “But you’re working yourself to the ground and I won’t have that. After what we’ve been through, you deserve some rest instead of days filled with writing mission reports or letters home to families. There’ll be enough time to write those letters.”

“But what if there won’t be?” Haldane shoots back. “What if we’re being shipped out next week and more letters need to be written?”

Hillbilly’s eyes soften. “Andy,” he says slowly, calmly, “they’re not going to ship us out next week. Or the week after that. We need replacements, we’re not even remotely fit for combat. They won’t send us out for a very long time and you know that as well as I do.”

They gaze at each other for several long moments. It was Haldane who broke eye contact first to look down at his hand which held the spoon and was still covered by Hillbilly’s. “Would you,” he begins. He has to clear his throat before he continues, “Would you help me? With the letters, I mean?”

Hillbilly smiles at him. “Of course I will. You know that.”

Apparently Haldane still has the urge to justify himself, for he says, “It’s just, there’s some men I didn’t know that well, but I know you did and maybe you’ll be able to find better words than I could and-“

“I’ll help you,” Hillbilly says again. “I’ll always help you, Andy. We’ll do this together, just like everything else.”

They stare at each other over their food and Eugene has to look away, feels his cheeks burn because no one’s ever looked at him like that, this intensely. When he looks back up again, Hillbilly has removed his hand and they’re both eating their chow in comfortable silence as if nothing happened. Eugene looks back at Snafu, Burgin and De L’Eau, but they are still talking, oblivious to what’s been going on just a few feet across from them. He shakes his head.

“Hey Sledgehammer,” Snafu says suddenly, “stop brooding and tell us a funny story from home.”

“Well,” Eugene says with a roll of his eyes, momentarily forgetting about his COs, “there was this one time Sid and I almost crashed my dad’s car …”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! First of all, I am so sorry for the delay in updating! I try to update once a week (usually on Sunday), but last weekend was RingCon here in Germany and immediately after that I caught a cold, so there went my plan to update during the week. And now I only have a terribly short chapter to make up for it XD But the next chapters will be longer, I can promise that.   
> Also, thanks again to everyone who is leaving kudos or comments! I really appreciate it!


	14. Pavuvu – Christmas 1944

**14\. Pavuvu – Christmas 1944**

Celebrating Christmas on a tropical island in the Pacific during wartimes is a strange affair. Coconut trees substitute for Christmas trees and instead of snow all they get is heat waves and the occasional rain shower. Not even the extraordinarily nice meal the Marines get on Christmas Day can lift Eugene’s spirits. He’s desperate for his mother’s gentle smile, his father’s kind eyes and even his brother’s awful jokes, although he knows that Edward isn’t home for Christmas either, fighting the war in Europe instead. He wonders if his brother feels as homesick as he does.

It’s nothing new for Eugene to miss home, but it’s harder on special occasions like holidays and birthdays. He knows he’s not the only one. Even though the Marines try their best to turn Pavuvu into the Christmas Island, it just isn’t the same. There’s a bit of sadness in everyone’s smiles and more often than not, the cheerfulness feels a little forced. Sometimes, all this false holiday cheer gets to be too much for Eugene and he needs to get away for a while, as much as that’s possible on a small island in the middle of nowhere.

This evening, Eugene follows the familiar path down to the beach instead of joining Snafu and Burgin who are going to see the new movie that is being shown tonight. He doesn’t really have the nerve for Snafu’s commentary and doesn’t want to spoil the evening for the others. Eugene likes the beach on quiet nights like this, when almost no one ventures down there and he can get lost in the waves and the stars for as long as he wants.

As he nears the edge of the jungle, Eugene stops in his tracks. Soft notes drift up from the beach and slowly, Eugene inches forward until he feels sand underneath his feet. Two figures are sitting not that far away, and Eugene doesn’t have to see their faces to know that it’s Haldane and Hillbilly. Their backs are to him and Hillbilly is playing _Silent Night_ on his guitar while Haldane is humming along softly. Not wanting to disturb them, Eugene sits down where he stands and just listens to the music.

Hillbilly plays one Christmas song after another, sometimes just strumming the notes, other times singing or humming the lyrics. All the songs he plays are slow, sad and melancholic songs, Eugene notes. Even the more jolly ones are played in a way that makes them sound somber, yet no less beautiful. Eugene can’t help but be mesmerized by the notes Hillbilly plucks from his guitar. It’s such a peaceful scene that he feels calmness wash over him and his thoughts just drift, never settling on anything.

It’s jarring when the music suddenly stops and Hillbilly breaks the following silence with a heavy sigh. “I hope the kids like what my mother brought them.”

“I’m sure they will,” Haldane says. “They always do, don’t they.”

Hillbilly shrugs. “If my mother’s letters are to be believed, that is.” He doesn’t sound convinced.

“Why the doubt?” Haldane asks, turning to face him. “That’s not like you.”

“I don’t know,” Hillbilly says. “I just wish I could be the one buying them something, instead of just sending money over. And I want to see their faces when they open their presents. That’s always been my favorite part of Christmas.”

Haldane sighs. “You could have gone-“

“No,” Hillbilly interrupts. “Don’t start. We’ve been over this and it’s done.”

Eugene has no idea what they’re talking about.

“Well,” Haldane continues, now in a soft voice, “maybe next year then.”

Hillbilly snorts at that. “I suppose someday the time will come when the war will indeed be over by Christmas, huh?”

“Maybe 45 will be our lucky number,” Haldane suggests.

“Yeah, maybe.”

Absentmindedly, Hillbilly begins picking at the strings of his guitar again. Eugene isn’t sure whether he’s just randomly plucking notes or actually playing a song, but it makes him smile nevertheless. Hillbilly’s playing is different when he’s alone with Haldane, Eugene thinks. It’s like he doesn’t try so hard and just lets the music flow. He doesn’t put on a show for anyone and instead plays quietly what comes to mind.

Hillbilly seems to be lost in thought or memories, Eugene doesn’t know, and Haldane watches him play with an unreadable expression on his face. The he reaches out and places his hand over Hillbilly’s.

“Stop, Eddie.”

The music ends and Hillbilly looks up, confused.

“Look,” Haldane starts. He looks around nervously but doesn’t spot Eugene in the darkness. “If it were up to me, I’d have you home with your family right now, safe and far away from this place. I never wanted to drag you down with me.”

Eugene wonders what he means. It sounds like both Haldane and Hillbilly had the chance to go home and declined. Eugene has no idea why someone wouldn’t want to go and be home for Christmas.

“But,” Haldane continues, “I can’t imagine anyone I’d rather spend Christmas with. I miss my parents and my sister, yes, and Pavuvu isn’t exactly festive, but it means a lot to me that you’re here, that you’d do that for me. And not just today. You always do so much for me and I don’t think I’ve ever thanked you for that.”

Even in the darkness, Eugene can tell that Hillbilly’s flustered. He thinks he should leave because this conversation is not meant for his ears, but he fears he’d do more harm than good if he now draws attention to himself. So instead he tries not to move at all, to stay invisible, and not to listen in.

“There’s no need to thank me, Andy,” Hillbilly says humbly, but Haldane is having none of it.

“I really think there is,” Haldane insists. Once more, he reaches out towards Hillbilly and this time his arms embrace him. “Thank you, Eddie. Thank you and Merry Christmas.”

Hillbilly’s arms slowly come up until he hugs Haldane back, however awkwardly it must be with the guitar between them. “Merry Christmas to you, too, Andy.”

They stay like this for a moment, with Haldane’s head buried in Hillbilly’s neck. Eugene looks pointedly away, up into the sky where unfamiliar stars are twinkling. Maybe he should have gone with Snafu and Burgin to see the movie after all, he thinks. He only looks back towards his COs when he hears Hillbilly laugh.

“Stop that. It tickles.”

Eugene can’t see what happened, but a moment later Hillbilly picks up his guitar from where it’s fallen into the sand and starts playing _Jingle Bells_. It’s not a melancholic version like the other songs Hillbilly’s played so far, but the proper version except for the lyrics which Hillbilly changes as he goes along so they fit their experiences in the Pacific a lot better.

“Dashing through the sea / In an open LVT / Over reefs we go / Really, really slow,” he sings. Eugene can hear the cheeky grin in Hillbilly’s voice.

Haldane starts laughing then and soon Hillbilly joins in, fingers faltering on the strings. With a smile on his face, Eugene quietly stands up, knowing it’s the right time to leave. He’s careful not to step on any leaves, logs or crabs as he slowly inches his way back into the jungle. With his spirits higher than they have been in days, he decides to join Snafu and Burgin and catch the rest of the movie. He doesn’t feel like being alone anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, thanks to everyone who's reading this story and leaving kudos. I hope you enjoy this Christmas chapter, even though Halloween only just passed and Christmas is still seven weeks away. XD


	15. Pavuvu – late February 1945

**15\. Pavuvu – late February 1945**

After being on Pavuvu for almost three months, the island feels like home. They have their routines worked out, with training exercises filling their days up until four, followed by afternoons spent playing Volleyball or Basketball or simply enjoying some time on the beach. They get used to it, even though they all know they shouldn’t.

When the training exercises start to take up most of their days, they know their next combat mission is not far away. Replacements keep coming in and they’re just as naïve as Eugene had been when he first came to Pavuvu and his heart aches for them. So many of them won’t return home, he knows, and if they do they’ll be changed by what they’ve seen and done, just like Eugene has been changed by Peleliu.

In late January they, along with the rest of the entire 1st Marine Division, are shipped out to Guadalcanal for amphibious maneuvers in LCI’s, spending two weeks on the island that veterans like Haldane and Hillbilly fought on not even three years ago. Their training comes to an abrupt end in mid-February when the assault on Iwo Jima starts. They return to Pavuvu, but Eugene knows it won’t last long. Haldane’s already told them that they’ll be shipped back out to Guadalcanal for more training exercises in a few days, so Eugene tries to enjoy the few peaceful moments that remain to him.

That evening, after a hard day spent trying to prepare the replacements for the things to come, King Company gathers on their favorite beach of Pavuvu. They always gravitate there, even the replacements, though no one tells them to. When Haldane and Hillbilly arrive, a disappointed groan goes through the ranks when the Marines realize that Hillbilly doesn’t have his guitar with him.

“Sorry, boys,” he says when he eases himself down into the sand next to Haldane, not too far from where Eugene is sitting but away from the main part of the company. “She broke a string yesterday and I haven’t been able to fix her yet.”

So they spend the evening without music. Some men are talking quietly together, others play cards in the fading light and others are just enjoying the company they’re in. Eugene himself is lying in the sand, staring up at the sky and waiting for the first stars to come out. He wonders how long he’ll still be able to enjoy a good night’s sleep or a quiet day without mortars falling all around him. He dreads going back into combat.

“It would have been too much to ask for the Japanese to surrender while we’re refitting, wouldn’t it?” he hears Haldane quietly say, putting into words what everyone in the company has been thinking for a while now.

“I don’t think they’re the surrendering kind of people,” Hillbilly comments just as quietly. “Although, maybe they’ll surprise us after Iwo Jima is over, who knows.”

Haldane shakes his head. “Since when are we that lucky?” he asks with a wry smile. “And even if they surrender, command will probably send us off to some other island nobody’s ever heard of before just to seize an airfield we won’t need in the end.”

Haldane is referring to Peleliu, Eugene knows. After the battle, it became clear quite early on that the island would be of no further strategic use to the military operations in the Pacific Theatre of War. It made every veteran of Peleliu bitter and angry when they realized that so many lives had been lost for nothing. And to top it all off the battle had been barely featured in the news coverage at home, as Eugene’s mother had told him in one of her letters. Apparently, General MacArthur’s return to the Philippines made for a far better story and Peleliu was forgotten, just like that.

“You think the casualty reports of Iwo Jima are true?” Hillbilly asks after a while, pulling Eugene out of his thoughts.

“Probably worse,” Haldane admits. He shakes his head. “So much loss of life and potential once again. Thank God they didn’t send us there.”

Hillbilly nods. “You think it can’t get any worse,” he muses. “Guadalcanal was bad enough. But then there’s Peleliu and you can’t imagine a more horrible place and now there’s the reports of Iwo Jima and it sounds even worse. Who knows if the place we’ll be going to won’t be the worst yet to come?”

“We’ll persevere,” Haldane says with conviction and in that moment Eugene wants to believe him. This company has been through so much and they’re still here. Not all of them, he knows, and many more will not make it back to Pavuvu after their next mission, but some will and they will remember and never forget. And that’s the important thing: that no one will forget the sacrifices they all made and will continue to make.

“I love your optimism,” Hillbilly says with a small smile. “When you’re like that you almost seem invincible.”

Haldane smiles back at him. “But only almost,” he says. “We both know I’m not, that neither of us is.”

Hillbilly lifts his hand and for a moment Eugene thinks he’s going to touch Haldane’s temple where the bullet grazed him all those months ago, but then he lowers his hand again, staring down at it with an unreadable expression.

“But we’ll get through the next battle,” Haldane says then, dropping his own hand to the ground and it almost looks like it lands on top of Hillbilly’s, but it’s too dark for Eugene to be sure. “And the one after that and the one after that, if we have to. Because we have something to look forward to, something to fight for and I’ll be damned if I let some desperate Japanese soldier destroys our future now that we’re so close to winning this war.”

Hillbilly keeps staring down at their hands. “Hope is a dangerous thing, Andy,” he murmurs.

“It’s all we have,” Haldane whispers back. “At least for now.”

“I know.”

They say nothing more after that and Eugene wonders what they were talking about, what future Haldane envisions for himself and Hillbilly. He hopes it’s a bright one, because if anyone in King Company deserves the best for the years to come, it’s their commanding officers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry for the wait. I was at an international conference last week and didn't have time for an update. This chapter is a bit of a filler chapter, one last chapter centered on Pavuvu before we finally move on to Okinawa and the last big setting of this story. I'm not quite satisfied with how this chapter turned out, but at least there's a bit of historical stuff in it. I hope you enjoy it anyway and I'll try to get the next chapter up in a couple of days. As a little teaser for the next one I can say that there'll be singing involved, once again, and this time by Andy *g* 
> 
> Also, thank you so much, again, for all the kudos and comments this story already got! It makes me so happy that people are reading and enjoying it!


	16. Okinawa – Early May 1945

**16\. Okinawa – Early May 1945**

Hillbilly had been right: Okinawa is worse than Peleliu. It hasn’t started out that way, though. The first few weeks have been almost easy, with next to no fighting happening in the area the 3/5 had been assigned to. But the peace and quiet hadn’t lasted and the sunshine had faded. Where Peleliu has been dry and hot, Okinawa is all torrents of rain. After days of fighting, often crawling through the mud because walking was nearly impossible, Eugene can’t remember how it feels to be dry anymore. Being wet has become a constant and their clothes are so thoroughly soaked that they don’t dry properly even when the sun is out.

Eugene hates the place. The new replacements don’t help, either. It seems like they’re always in the way, always making mistakes, always needing guidance. The veterans – and Eugene can’t believe he’s counted among those now – simply don’t have the patience to help them anymore. At least, most of them don’t. There’s still the old breed, men like Gunny Haney, Hillbilly and Haldane, who seem to have an infinite well of patience. Eugene has no idea how they do it. They’ve been through three years of combat and three campaigns, with Okinawa being the fourth, and they still manage to care about every single one of their men and look after them.

Eugene wonders where they get all that energy from. Most Marines have given up helping the replacements because most of them will be dead sooner or later anyway, but Haldane and Hillbilly still make their rounds every evening, talking quietly to the men and trying to lift their spirits. It reminds Eugene of that time on Peleliu when they had done just the same for him. Eugene’s changed since then, though. He’s still scared, but mostly he’s indifferent. With every day they’re in combat he’s becoming a little more numb.

Dawn is slowly creeping up on the horizon and Eugene mentally gets ready for another day of fighting. He stretches, mindful not to wake Snafu and Burgin who are still sleeping next to him. They’re sitting in a muddy hole that’s probably already a grave for someone. Eugene’s stomach rolls when he thinks about all these people buried in the mud. He’s just glad they didn’t dig deep enough to discover them. Some of the men hadn’t been so lucky the previous evening.

Looking around, he catches sight of the foxhole Haldane and Hillbilly share. It’s just across from him and he can see Haldane getting restless, on the verge of waking up. Hillbilly’s head is lying on his shoulder and when Haldane realizes this, he stops moving and just looks at him for a moment. There’s a soft smile on his face that Eugene can just make out in the light of dawn. Then Haldane sighs and shakes Hillbilly’s shoulder gently.

“Hey, Eddie,” he says softly so as not to wake the rest of the company. If Eugene’s own foxhole had been just a bit further away, he probably wouldn’t have been able to hear him. “Time to wake up, sleepyhead.”

Hillbilly grumbles something and buries his head deeper into Haldane’s shoulder. Eugene smiles at the sight. Haldane huffs out a laugh.

“Come on,” he says, and then, to Eugene’s astonishment, he begins to quietly sing _Happy Birthday_. Hillbilly’s eyes open in surprise.

“… happy birthday, dear Eddie … happy birthday to you,” Haldane ends with a smile.

Hillbilly shakes his head. “You sang for me,” he says, as if he can’t quite believe it. “You hate to sing.”

Haldane’s smile softened. “Only for you, Eddie. Happy birthday.”

Looking down in an oddly shy way, Hillbilly replies quietly, “Thank you, Andy.”

“So, how does one feel at 28?” Haldane asks after a moment of silence.

Hillbilly shrugs. “Exhausted, wet, homesick … business as usual, I guess.”

“Just as I thought,” Haldane says and starts rummaging through his pack. He seems to find what he’s looking for, for he stops and glances back at Hillbilly. “Now, I can’t have my best lieutenant feeling like that on his 28th birthday, can I? That’s why I’ve got a present for you.”

He pulls out a stack of papers from his pack, safely secured in a plastic bag so that the rain can’t get to them. Holding them out to Hillbilly, Haldane explains, “I had a feeling we’d be back in combat by the time of your birthday, so I wrote your mom and asked her to have your friends and family write your birthday letters a little early and send them straight to me, so I can give them to you today as a surprise.” He grins at Hillbilly. “Surprise!”

Hillbilly stares down at the letters for a moment before he takes them carefully into his hands and holds them close to his heart. He looks ragged, fighting against his emotions as he looks up at Haldane and says in a choked up voice, “I- I don’t know what to say. Thank you, Andy.”

Haldane pulls him into an embrace then and Eugene can see how Hillbilly clutches the back of his uniform with the hand that is not holding the letters, as if he’s holding on for dear life. “You’re welcome, Eddie,” Haldane whispers. “I wish there was more I could do. If it were up to me you’d have the biggest birthday cake in the history of birthday cakes.”

“You could make me one out of mud,” Hillbilly suggests and Haldane laughs.

“If that’d be what you really wanted, I would,” he says seriously and lets Hillbilly go.

“I know you would,” Hillbilly says. He smiles at him and it’s soft and tender and Eugene wishes he’d stayed asleep and hadn’t intruded on this moment that was obviously meant for just the two of them. He wonders if his friends would do the same for him, go to such lengths just to put a smile on his face on his birthday. Haldane must have planned this for some time and Hillbilly is the luckiest person in the world to have him as his friend, Eugene thinks.

“Go on, read them,” Haldane encourages quietly. “We’ve still got some time before we’ve got to rouse the company.”

So Hillbilly opens letter after letter, pouring over the words, sometimes huffing out a quiet laugh, sometimes looking like he’s about to cry. At one time, he holds up a painting for Haldane to see. “My youngest sister drew this,” he says, sounding proud.

“She’s quite the artist,” Haldane agrees. “How old is she now?”

“Just turned six a month ago,” Hillbilly says. “She’ll be going to school soon. She couldn’t even hold a pencil right the last time I saw her, much less draw anything.”

They’re quiet after that and Hillbilly opens more letters. He stops when he reaches the last letter, though, and looks questioningly at Haldane. “Why?” he asks.

Haldane meets Hillbilly’s gaze even though he seems mildly embarrassed. “Because there are some things I can’t say out loud, not yet,” he explains, though Eugene has no idea what he’s talking about. “Things you deserve to know, Eddie. Also, I didn’t know if I’d make it this far, so I wrote this just in case.”

Hillbilly nods at him. Then he takes a deep breath and opens the letter while Haldane watches him anxiously. Eugene wonders what the letter contains, what kind of things Haldane is unable to say to him in person. When, after a while, Hillbilly blinks, tears drop down his face. He wipes them away hastily before turning to Haldane, looking wretched in a way Eugene hasn’t seen him before.

“Me, too, Andy,” he chokes out, gripping Haldane’s hand tightly. “God, I wish I could tell you-“

“There’ll come a time,” Haldane says in the same reassuring, soothing voice he uses to calm his men, he used to calm Eugene with on Peleliu. “And I know, Eddie. You tell me in so many ways, every day. Believe me, I know.”

Hillbilly nods and, after a moment, rests his forehead against Haldane’s shoulder. Eugene wonders if he’s finally allowing the tears to fall, but if he does he doesn’t make a sound. Haldane wraps an arm around his shoulders and leans his head against Hillbilly’s, closing his eyes and savoring the moment.

It doesn’t last long. They’re still at war, they still have a company to lead, so they let go of each other and once more Hillbilly drags a hand down his face in embarrassment. Haldane nudges his shoulder gently.

“Ready to face the day?” he asks.

Hillbilly’s answering smile is blinding. “More than ever.”

Eugene’s surprised when Hillbilly gives the letters back to Haldane, telling him to hold onto them since they’ve been safe with him for such a long time. Together, they put them first in the plastic bag and then back into Haldane’s pack before they stand up and begin to rouse the men as if nothing ever happened.

Next to Eugene, Snafu stirs and Eugene closes his eyes, feigning sleep. He doesn’t want anyone to find out he’s been eavesdropping again. So he “wakes up” with the rest of the company and goes about his day as usual. But while the other guys wonder why Hillbilly is so full of energy today, Eugene just smiles and thinks, It’s because it’s his birthday and Haldane somehow made him the happiest person on earth with simply a song, a stack of letters from home and some written words that will only ever be meant for Hillbilly’s eyes to see.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter, and we're finally on Okinawa. King landed on the island on Easter Sunday, which was April 1st. I don't know the exact date of Eddie's birthday, but a couple of lines from "Brotherhood of Heroes" suggest it's either the end of April or the beginning of May. I went with the latter which is why this chapter is set in May and not in the beginning of the campaign.
> 
> Also, if anyone is wondering what Andy's letter contains, don't worry, you'll read it at some point in the sequel to this story which is already in the works and is going to fill in some of the blanks since it's written from the points of view of Andy and Eddie.


	17. Okinawa – Mid-May 1945

**17\. Okinawa – Mid-May 1945**

He’s seen a mother and baby getting blown up today. Eugene can’t believe someone would go to such lengths to kill their enemy, to win a battle, to win the war. Now that it’s evening and they’re resting, the events of the day catch up with him and he can’t get the image of the desperate mother out of his head. He wishes they could have done something for the baby, at least.

“Don’t dwell on it,” he says quietly to himself, repeating the words Haldane said to him so long ago. Sometimes, though – on days like this – it’s hard to ignore the horrors around him. Sometimes, Eugene wants nothing more than to curl up and cry for every life lost so pointlessly.

Instead, he digs his foxhole and sits down, and for once Snafu doesn’t join him. They both need to be alone right now, Eugene thinks, to process what happened. The company as a whole is quiet, with everyone lost in thought. When it starts to rain, Eugene can’t help but think that it’s the perfect ending to a horrible day.

He settles in for the night, curls up under his poncho and is about to close his eyes when he sees Hillbilly walk hurriedly past his foxhole. Eugene frowns and watches as Hillbilly comes to a stop behind a rock that hides him from view of most of the company. When Hillbilly braces his hands against the stone and lets his head hang low in obvious defeat, Eugene feels at a loss. He’s never seen Hillbilly letting his guard down like this, though, Eugene supposes, it was bound to happen. They all have their breaking points and today, apparently, Hillbilly has reached his.

Suddenly, Hillbilly sinks to his knees in the mud, breathing heavily and Eugene realizes with a jolt that he’s about to throw up. He looks away, wanting to give him some privacy and catches sight of Haldane who’s walking up to him through the rain.

“How’re you holding up?” Haldane asks, crouching down next to his foxhole.

Eugene nods at him by way of greeting. “I’m okay, sir.”

“Good,” Haldane says. “Any chance you’ve seen Hillbilly? My lieutenant seems to be missing.”

Eugene glances at the rock Hillbilly is hiding behind. He knows Hillbilly chose the place because he doesn’t want to bother anyone or make the company think something’s wrong. If it was any other person asking about him, Eugene would tell them he has no idea where Hillbilly is.

But this is Haldane, so he says, “Yes, sir. He’s just behind that rock over there.” He points ahead to his left. “And I think you should go to him.”

Haldane frowns and looks over his shoulder but Eugene knows he can’t see Hillbilly from his position. “What makes you say that?” he asks when he turns back around.

Eugene sighs. “I think he took what happened earlier pretty hard,” he says vaguely, only speculating about what might be going on in Hillbilly’s head.

Haldane stares at him a moment longer, then nods and walks in the direction Eugene pointed at. Eugene doesn’t want to look, doesn’t want to see what happens, but curiosity gets the better of him and it takes his mind away from his own miserable thoughts. So he watches Haldane trudge through the mud, coming to an abrupt halt the moment he sees Hillbilly.

“Oh Eddie,” he says quietly and it sounds sad.

Hillbilly jumps violently. “Go away,” he chokes out, not even looking at him.

“You know I’d never do that,” Haldane says and drops to his knees next to him. He puts an arm around Hillbilly’s shoulder and holds him while he retches up the remains of his meager lunch. Eugene doesn’t know how long they stay like this. It’s only when Hillbilly starts to dry-heave, when nothing but bile comes up, that Haldane loosens his grip. It becomes comforting instead of simply offering support and Haldane’s other hand gently rubs up and down Hillbilly’s right arm.

“You feeling better?” Haldane asks gently.

Hillbilly shakes his head. “Not really.” His voice sounds rough and brittle and he turns away from Haldane, brings some distance between them and curls in around himself. Haldane seems just as surprised by this as Eugene is.

“Eddie, you don’t have to hide from me,” he says, sounding a bit hurt. “You know that, right?”

Hillbilly stares at him just for a moment, before he averts his gaze in shame. “I didn’t want to worry you,” he finally whispers.

Haldane reaches out a hand. “I always worry about you when you’re not by my side,” he smiles. Then his face turns serious again. “I know the Marine Corps and society tell you that you have to be strong all the time. Well, screw that. I’m telling you now: It’s okay to cry, it’s okay to be overwhelmed by everything this war has thrown at us so far and it’s okay to let others be strong for you every once in a while.” He reaches out his other hand. “You’ve always been there for me when I needed someone to tell me to catch a break, when I couldn’t write another letter home to a mother that would never see her son again. You were there for me when I got hurt even though you were injured yourself. You sing me to sleep just because I ask you to. You always try to make my life better, sometimes with grand gestures, sometimes with a simple smile. Now it’s my turn, Eddie. Will you let me be there for you?”

Hillbilly’s face crumbles and he nods. Immediately, Haldane moves forward and gathers him in his arms. Now that the dam has broken, Hillbilly clings tightly to him, burying his face in Haldane’s shoulder. He mumbles, “I’m sorry, Andy, so sorry.”

“It’s alright,” Haldane says quietly. Then, he adds, “This is about the baby, isn’t it?”

“How could they do that?” Hillbilly chokes out, sounding just as shocked by what they all have witnessed earlier this day as Eugene still feels. “How can anyone kill a mother and her baby like that?

Haldane shakes his head, looking helpless. “I don’t know, Eddie.”

They are quiet for a moment, then Hillbilly loosens the embrace slightly to lay his head on Haldane’s shoulder so he can look up at him. “My baby sister was not much older when I saw her last,” he whispers. “Her hair was just as dark. Every time I close my eyes I see her before me, in my mother’s arms and then they get blown up.”

“But this was not your sister, Eddie,” Haldane says firmly. “Your sister is six years old now. Remember the drawing she sent you? She’s alive and well at home with the rest of your family.”

“I know,” Eddie says and he sounds wretched. “I do, I know that. But the images just won’t go away.”

Haldane thinks about that for a moment, before he says, “Close your eyes.” When Hillbilly looks hesitant, he murmurs, “Trust me, Eddie. Just close your eyes. I’d never let anything happen to you.”

“Okay,” Hillbilly breathes and, even though he still looks doubtful, he closes his eyes.

“Now, concentrate on my hand.”

In the darkening dusk Eugene can see how Haldane cups the side of Hillbilly’s face with one hand, gently caressing the dirty, scratched skin with his thumb.

“Do you feel that?” Haldane whispers. When Hillbilly nods he says, “This, right here, this is real, Eddie. This and nothing else. Just concentrate on that and you’ll be okay.”

They say nothing more and, with each minute that passes, Hillbilly relaxes more and more until Eugene is fairly certain that he’s fallen asleep. Haldane doesn’t seem to mind. He continues the movement of his thumb and maneuvers them into a more comfortable position against the rock with no intention of going back to his foxhole. It’s still raining and they’re soaked to the bone but Eugene doesn’t want to disturb them by offering to get them some ponchos. Even with the rain they both look peaceful, as far as Eugene can tell in the fading light.

Seeing them like this warms something deep within him he thought the war had killed. He finds himself smiling, something he hasn’t done in a long time. Haldane and Hillbilly give him hope that there’s a chance he’ll make it through this – not just physically, but mentally. Eugene knows he’ll never forget the things he’s seen, that he’ll have to deal with them one day. But he also knows that, as long as he has people who care about him, who love him, he won’t have his soul torn out as his father has feared.

He won’t be the same, but his soul will heal, just like Hillbilly’s is healing right now because of a simple, gentle caress.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry for the delay with this chapter, but I was at a work-related meeting last weekend and didn't have time to post a new chapter. Thank you, btw, for 30 kudos! You guys are great!
> 
> This chapter is inspired by a scene in The Pacific, where a woman holding a baby is being used by the Japanese. You probably know which scene I'm talking about. This chapter is heavy on the hurt/comfort. The next one will be a lot more fluffy before things get worse in chapter 19 once more ...


	18. Okinawa – Mid-May 1945

**18\. Okinawa – Mid-May 1945**

They find a baby who miraculously survived a mortar shell that may or may not have been one of theirs. Eugene tries not to think about what they’ve done, what someone has done to this family. This is on them, he knows. That other baby had died in his mother’s arms because some Japanese soldier strapped a bomb onto her. The baby crying in front of him right now lost his whole family because of Marines shelling the area and he hates himself for taking a part in turning this baby into an orphan.

He can tell that Snafu is just as shocked as he is, standing next to him and staring uncomprehendingly at the baby. Snafu tries to alleviate the guilt, tries to tell them both that this may not be their doing, but it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t change the fact that this baby won’t grow up with his family, won’t make his mother smile anymore or laugh at the grimaces his father pulls.

They keep staring at the crying baby, unable to bring themselves to move until Hillbilly steps into the hut behind them. He pushes them out of the way immediately and makes his way over to the baby, completely ignoring the signs of death and destruction around him. Carefully and with an ease that tells of years of practice Hillbilly picks up the baby and cradles him gently against his shoulder. He turns around and glares at them.

“What’s wrong with you two?” he asks, sounding furious. Eugene even takes a step back, because he’s never seen Hillbilly like this. There is something in his eyes that clearly says, _Don’t mess with me right now_.

When none of them answers, Hillbilly shakes his head and says, “Search the rest of the house. If someone’s still alive, call for a corpsman.”

Hillbilly steps outside without another word, all the while making shushing noises at the baby, and Eugene and Snafu dutifully search the rest of the house. There’s a woman in another room, barely hanging onto her life and Eugene is so sick and tired of death. He takes the woman’s hand in his while Snafu hollers for a corpsman. They wait in silence until he comes and it’s only then that Eugene releases the woman’s hand, trying to tell her with his eyes that the baby will be taken care of, that Hillbilly will make sure of it.

When he leaves the house, he doesn’t look back, knowing that the corpsman will be powerless to help her. He quickens his steps, trying to bring as much distance between himself and that home that was probably filled with laughter and happiness not that long ago. Snafu follows in his footsteps. The rest of King Company is not too far away and Eugene and Snafu join them, sitting down on some rocks. Burgin sees them and comes over, settling down next to them. He offers Eugene his canteen and Eugene gratefully accepts it.

After handing it back to Burgin, Eugene lets his gaze wander. Not too far off, Hillbilly is pacing around with the baby still in his arms, gently rocking him and singing to him, trying to get him to quiet down. It’s a mesmerizing sight, seeing Hillbilly like that.

He must have done this a million times with his own sisters and brothers, Eugene thinks.

It shows in the way he cradles the baby’s head in his hand, how he’s calm and quiet and tries to tell the baby with his body language that everything is alright, that there’s no need to cry. And it works. Eugene’s amazed to see how the baby slowly stops crying until he is quiet apart from hiccupping now and then.

“There you go, little one,” Hillbilly murmurs with a small smile on his face. The baby stares up at him and they both seem to be lost in the moment. It’s only when Haldane comes over and joins them that Hillbilly tears his gaze away. His smile turns blinding when he looks at Haldane.

“Look who’s here,” he tells the baby.

Haldane chuckles. Eugene can’t help but notice how his left hand comes to rest on the small of Hillbilly’s back while his right hand reaches out toward the baby. The baby immediately latches onto it and stares at Haldane’s finger with huge eyes like it’s the most astonishing thing he’s ever seen.

“Hello, you,” Haldane says softly. Then he looks up at Hillbilly. “And hello to you, too. Everything alright, Eddie?” There’s a touch of worry in his voice.

Hillbilly nods at him. “I’m good. Though the little one here is in desperate need of a diaper change and some milk.”

Haldane grins at him mischievously. “I believe the company’s established that you’re the mom in this relationship.”

Hillbilly rolls his eyes at him and playfully nudges him with his shoulder. “Doesn’t mean I’ll breastfeed the baby in front of them,” he says, sounding dead serious. “Between you and me: I don’t think the kids are ready for that.”

Haldane laughs and it rings across the battlefield, making several heads turn toward them. The baby in Hillbilly’s arms stares up at Haldane for a moment before he lets out a gurgling laugh himself. He reaches his arms towards Haldane and Hillbilly hands him over with a smirk.

“I believe our little one wants some quality time with dad,” he says and Eugene can’t help but snort at Haldane’s expression when he suddenly finds himself with a handful of baby in his arms. Next to Eugene, Burgin and Snafu chuckle.

“Uhm, Eddie?” Haldane says. “I don’t think I should hold him. I’ve never held a baby before.”

Hillbilly rolls his eyes and leans closer. “It’s not rocket science, Andy. Just make sure you support the head and you’ll be fine.” He pauses, readjusts the baby in Haldane’s arms so he rests comfortably against Haldane’s chest and adds, “And relax.”

Haldane still looks uncomfortable and tense but the baby doesn’t seem to mind. When Hillbilly pulls faces at him, he laughs again, sometimes even squealing with joy. By now, everyone around them is staring at Haldane, Hillbilly and the baby, silently fascinated by this scene of happiness in the middle of war. Haldane and Hillbilly don’t seem to notice, being too occupied with the baby they’re entertaining. It strikes Eugene how right they look like this, standing close to each other with Hillbilly’s hand resting on Haldane’s arm, both of them smiling at the baby. It’s nice seeing them this happy.

“They look like a family,” Snafu whispers beside him. “You know, like these disgustingly happy, perfect families you see in children’s books?”

Eugene nods, because Snafu is right. Haldane may not be a dad and Hillbilly’s certainly not a mom, but right now they look more like a happy couple than some of the real couples Eugene’s known. It should be weird seeing them like that, but somehow it’s not. Maybe it’s because their small moment of happiness washes over the whole company in a rejuvenating way, making people smile and forget for a short time the horrors they see every day.

“See?” Hillbilly says quietly, having no idea that the eyes of the whole company are on them. “It’s not so hard, now is it, Andy?”

Haldane looks at him fondly. “Well, I’ve learned from the best.”

Hillbilly dismisses that with a shrug. “I’ve just had a lot of practice over the years, what with being the oldest of ten. It would come naturally to you too, if you’d grown up with a bunch of younger siblings.”

“Still,” Haldane says. “That doesn’t change the fact that you’re amazing with him. Your brothers and sisters are very lucky to have you.” He pauses, then adds, “I’m very lucky to have you at my side, as well.”

Hillbilly ducks his head shyly. “Oh, stop it, Andy.”

Before Haldane can reply the baby yawns and leans his head against his chest, closing his eyes tiredly.

“That’s the best part,” Hillbilly tells Haldane quietly, gazing at the baby. “When they’re falling asleep in your arms, feeling utterly safe and trusting you to take care of them.”

Eugene thinks back to the night Hillbilly had been lost in grief over another baby that would sleep forever now, and suddenly he gets why Hillbilly was able to fall asleep in the pouring rain after that horrible day. Haldane had been there and that had made all the difference. Hillbilly trusted Haldane, not only with his life, but also with his heart and when Haldane had held him, he’d felt safe, just like the baby in Haldane’s arms does in this moment.

“What do I do now?” Haldane whispers now that the baby has fallen asleep.

Hillbilly smiles at him. “You enjoy the quiet.” More serious, he says, “We should get a corpsman to take care of him, get him some new diapers and something to eat, make sure he finds a new home.”

Haldane agrees. “We should.”

Neither of them moves for a moment, both staring at the sleeping baby, lost in thought. Finally, Haldane hands the baby back to Hillbilly, careful not to jostle him so much as to wake him, saying, “Stay here. I’ll see what I can do for the little guy.”

Hillbilly nods at him. Haldane gently caresses the baby’s cheek that is not pressed into Hillbilly’s shoulder one last time, before he exchanges one more look with Hillbilly and leaves. Hillbilly keeps staring after him, unconsciously starting to rock the baby once more.

When Haldane comes back to them, a corpsman from headquarters at his heels, Eugene can see that Hillbilly’s slightly reluctant to hand the baby over. “He’s got two young kids at home,” Haldane tells Hillbilly as they watch the corpsman leave with the still sleeping baby. “He promised to find a good family for him.”

They settle down in their foxhole for the night, as does the rest of the company, but Hillbilly’s still staring in the direction the corpsman vanished with the baby. In the dusk, Eugene can just make out how Haldane brings his arm up to rest around Hillbilly’s shoulders in a comforting manner. Hillbilly leans into the touch with a sigh.

“I hope he’ll have a better future,” he whispers. In a tired voice, he adds, “God, I haven’t wanted to go home so badly in a long time.”

“I know,” Haldane murmurs, closing his eyes and tightening his hold on Hillbilly in the darkness. “I know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! Once again, many thanks for all the kudos! I really hope you enjoy the new chapter since it's probably the happiest one in the whole Okinawa arc and personally I'm quite fond of it. 
> 
> I also want to wish you all a very happy Christmas since the next chapter will probably go online in about a week, once Christmas is over.


	19. Okinawa – 22.05.1945

**19\. Okinawa – 22.05.1945**

It’s their third night of shelling at Wana Draw and everyone’s on edge. Eugene’s never felt so shattered in his entire life as he does now, after enduring hours of shells hitting the ground all around them. Yesterday, the shelling had lessened and finally stopped when dawn came, and he hopes today will be the same. He can already see light creeping up the horizon, even though the sky is full of heavy rain clouds. It had been raining for five days in a row now, turning everything into mud and making it impossible to maneuver around much. Everyone around him is staring anxiously at the sky and desperately waiting for the shelling to end so that they can finally breathe again and assess the damage of the attack. Eugene hopes that King’s casualties of the night consist only of wounded men. He’s sick of seeing people he cares about die. Just yesterday, Burgin had been hit and for one shocking moment Eugene had thought they’d lost him, until Burgin had given him a grin and a thumbs-up while the corpsman bandaged his wound. He wonders how Burgin is doing right now, when another shell explodes among the remains of King.

Another half an hour goes by until the shelling lessens. It’s subtle at first, but another few minutes pass and the shells come only sporadically anymore. Eugene lets out a sigh of relief and closes his eyes thankfully. He’s so tired.

His eyes snap open when a shell hits close by and he tries to make himself as small as possible. He’s not hit by shrapnel and, thankfully, neither is Snafu whom he’s sharing a foxhole with. Then he hears a voice frantically call out, “Andy!” and the blood in his veins runs cold. It’s Hillbilly and he sounds absolutely terrified. Eugene knows something terrible must have happened and feels dread pour in his stomach.

The shelling finally, blessedly, stops completely, and Eugene risks a glance over his foxhole towards the place Hillbilly and Haldane were staying in throughout the night. What he sees makes him want to cry, brings back awful memories of Peleliu.

“Corpsman!” he screams at the top of his lungs. “We need a corpsman here!”

Haldane is lying in his foxhole with Hillbilly kneeling beside him, and there’s so much blood everywhere. Eugene can see a jagged piece of shrapnel sticking out where Haldane’s neck meets his shoulder, with another piece stuck in his right thigh. Haldane’s still conscious and seems dazed, as if he doesn’t really know what happened. He stares at Hillbilly’s stricken face above him with a small smile and slowly raises his right hand to cup his cheek. It’s such a tender moment amidst the horror of war that, to Eugene, time seems to stand still as Hillbilly and Haldane lock eyes. The moment doesn’t last long, because all of a sudden, Haldane’s eyes roll into the back of his head and his hand falls limply to his side and the reality of what has happened comes crashing down around them.

“No!” Hillbilly says, gripping Haldane’s lifeless hand in his own, squeezing and tugging at it desperately. “No, Andy, wake up! Please, you have to stay with me. Andy!”

Haldane doesn’t move and Eugene’s heart breaks for Hillbilly who’s staring down at Haldane’s still form in incomprehension. Hillbilly’s voice is quiet and choked when he pleads, “Andy? Please, open your eyes? Don’t do this to me. You have to wake up. Can you do that, for me? God, Andy, please wake up.”

There’s no reaction and next to Eugene, Snafu once more yells for a corpsman. Most of the company is shocked into stillness when they realize that Captain Haldane, _Ack-Ack_ , is shot and lying motionless on the muddy ground while the rain starts pouring down on them. They all bear silent witness to Hillbilly’s grief, unable to help.

“We should have gone home,” Hillbilly starts to mumble, gently carding a hand through Haldane’s wet hair in the same manner as he’d done back on Peleliu when Haldane had been wounded. He looks utterly hopeless. “Why didn’t we just go home?”

Eugene’s been wondering about that for a while, ever since he’s heard Haldane and Hillbilly talking about going home for Christmas on Pavuvu. After Peleliu, he’d noticed that almost all veterans of Guadalcanal had been transferred stateside. Some, like Hillbilly and Haldane, however, had decided to stay on and Eugene still has no idea why anyone in their right mind would do that. Right now, Eugene, like Hillbilly, wishes they had left when they had the chance. Then Haldane would not be lying here, bleeding out so far away from home, and Hillbilly would not look like his whole world has come crashing down.

Finally, a corpsman arrives. It’s Doc Katz and he’s so dirty Eugene’s not sure how much of it is mud or blood. Sliding into the foxhole next to Hillbilly, he observes the situation before him for a moment. Without saying anything, he gets out some plasma from his bag and connects it to Haldane’s arm. There are no reassuring words as he carefully fingers at the shrapnel stuck in Haldane’s neck but doesn’t pull it out. Instead, he waves two stretcher bearers over.

“We’ve got to get him to the aid station, quickly. He won’t last long like this.”

He shoves Hillbilly out of the way and Eugene feels sorry for him when he has to let go of Haldane’s hand and is robbed of saying goodbye. As if carved from stone, Hillbilly stares as Katz and the stretcher bearers lift Haldane onto the stretcher and stagger out of the hole and away. It doesn’t take long for the rain to hide them behind grey curtains. The only thing that remains of Haldane is the bloody handprint he’s left on Hillbilly’s cheek that’s slowly being washed away.

For one horrible instant Hillbilly looks ready to break down, but then he takes in a shuddering breath, rubs the heels of his hands forcefully over his eyes and Eugene can see the exact moment he brings up his professionalism like a shield. Eugene knows that now is not the time for Hillbilly or any of them to grief for the potential loss of their skipper, but he wishes there was, because Hillbilly looks shaken, hurt and hollow and in no way fit for combat, let alone the task of leading the company after such a loss.

He does it anyway, because they have no choice. Together with Lieutenant Stanley, he gets the company reorganized, the other wounded taken care of and the dead taken away. The rest of them settle back down in their foxholes and watch the lines, as much as they can with the rain coming down in torrents around them. An hour ago the only thing on Eugene’s mind had been sleep. Now, he can’t even think about closing his eyes.

So he sits with Snafu and waits for something to happen – for the Japs to attack or news of Haldane, anything. Slowly, the hours tick by and when dusk settles around them, nothing has happened. They prepare for another night of heavy shelling, though by some miracle it doesn’t come. Instead, the only thing they hear in the dark and try not to listen to is the desperate attempt of Hillbilly as he tries to stifle his sobs.

Eugene almost wishes for the shells to come, if only so that they would drown out the sounds of Hillbilly breaking apart a few feet away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year, everyone! I hope 2015 has treated you all well so far. I've spent the last three days being sick, but things are looking up and it's time for another chapter. After the happiness that was chapter 18, chapter 19 is now full of angst and setting things in motion that will define the last chapters of this story. We have six chapters left with three of them already written and the other three roughly planned out. Depending on when I'll be able to write those last chapters, updates may take a bit longer after chapter 22, but don't worry, this story will be finished and the sequel is already in the works as well, so there's that =)  
> Also, thanks again for all the kudos! Enjoy the new chapter!


	20. Okinawa – 28.05.1945

**20\. Okinawa – 28.05.1945**

After Haldane was hit and Doc Katz returned to them later that fateful day with no news besides that their CO had been alive when they’d reached the aid station, morale was still low in King Company. Hillbilly kept phoning Battalion CP day after day to no avail, getting no information on Haldane’s condition. It hurt seeing the look of disappointment on Hillbilly’s face every time he put the phone down, but at least, according to Snafu, no news were not bad news.

That changed on the third day after Haldane had been taken away. Eugene was there when Hillbilly phoned Battalion CP, along with the rest of his machine gun squad. He didn’t hear what the guy on the other end of the line said, but the moment the color drained from Hillbilly’s face he and everyone around him knew that Captain Haldane would not be coming back to them, that the worst case scenario just became real.

He vividly remembers how the phone fell limply from Hillbilly’s hand into the mud and the way his eyes stared into nothingness, looking like all the life had been sucked out of them. What the Japanese had failed to achieve the last four years, a simple phone call managed to do in a matter of seconds: Hillbilly broke, quietly and for the whole world to see.

Three days later, and King Company is still in shock over the loss of their skipper. Somehow, they get through the days and manage to stay a functioning unit. Fuelled by the need for revenge, they try to make the Japs pay as much as they can, fighting with a ferocity and motivation Eugene hasn’t felt in a long time. It’s not enough, though. No matter how many enemy soldiers they kill, it doesn’t bring Haldane back to them – or Hillbilly, for that matter.

Hillbilly’s still with them, at least physically, commanding King with the help of Lieutenant “Stumpy” Stanley. They’re the reason the company did not break apart after they lost Haldane. But while the company may be somewhat okay right now, Hillbilly is not. Everyone can see he’s different, has changed since the news of Haldane’s death reached him. He still cares for his men, that much is obvious. He makes his rounds every night and morning to make sure everyone’s alright, but he doesn’t smile anymore when he does it. There is no more small talk when he comes to Eugene’s foxhole, no more chatting about their families back home or any encouraging words. There’s no light in his eyes anymore.

Without Haldane, Hillbilly is all business. He doesn’t allow himself a moment’s rest from his job. His main focus is being a good lieutenant and leader, someone who makes the right decisions and tries to get them through this campaign with as few casualties as possible. With the loss of Haldane, Hillbilly’s life has been reduced to commanding King and he pours everything he has left to give into it, leading by example just like Haldane used to do. But during the quiet times, Hillbilly’s become distant, letting no one get close to him, always keeping to himself. Even surrounded by a whole company, Hillbilly’s the loneliest person Eugene has ever seen.

They all hate seeing Hillbilly like that. Everyone knows that something’s terribly wrong, but they have no idea how to help him. Hillbilly is doing an excellent job of commanding the company and there’s no valid reason for anyone to tell him to take a step back, or get him off the line for some much needed rest. Eugene’s pretty sure that Hillbilly hasn’t been sleeping since Haldane’s been taken away six days ago. He’s caught him nodding a few times when exhaustion becomes overwhelming but it never takes long for the nightmares to start. Eugene hates those nights when Hillbilly wakes with a painful gasp, and starts shivering so violently he looks like he’s falling apart right there. The blanket Hillbilly pulls tightly around himself beneath his poncho doesn’t really help. It’s almost as if he’s going into shock each time he faces Haldane’s death in his dreams.

Eugene can’t really blame Hillbilly for not sleeping but he also knows that this can’t go on forever. Hillbilly already looks dead on his feet, with dark circles beneath his eyes, and lack of sleep makes him snappy in a way he’s never been before. Just four days ago Stumpy had tried to take some of the workload off of Hillbilly, wanting to give him a chance to rest. Hillbilly’s only reply had been a hissed, “Mind your own business, Lieutenant, and do your job,” even though they’d been friends for years and Hillbilly himself had helped Haldane in similar ways before.

Things got even worse when Stumpy came down with malaria, on the same day Haldane was declared dead, and had to be taken to the aid station even though he fought tooth and nails to stay. It was a further blow to the company to lose annother officer so soon after Haldane, and Hillbilly seemed to crumble beneath all the grief, loss and responsibility he carried on his shoulders. He continued to lead King to his best abilities after that, now with Lieutenant Loveday as his Second-in-command, but Eugene and most of the company couldn’t help but wonder how far off the day was when Hillbilly’s strength would run out and he would shatter completely.

Right now, Hillbilly and Loveday are on the frontlines checking on the men while Eugene and the rest of Number 2 Gun are somewhat behind the lines, waiting for orders. Snafu is dozing beside him while Eugene and the others are eating C rations in silence. Nothing much has been going on for the last few hours, so they’re all a little more relaxed than usual. The rain’s finally stopped as well and they’re enjoying the rare moments of sunshine and quiet, knowing they won’t last.

Eugene’s drowsing with his eyes half-closed in the sunlight, when suddenly the silence is interrupted by footsteps walking through the mud behind him. Expecting a Japanese infiltrator and cursing himself for letting his guard down, he scrambles for his weapon. They all point their rifles towards the sound of the noise and wait for the enemy to show himself. The enemy, it turns out, is a dead man walking.

“I know I’ve been gone for a couple of days, but I’m pretty sure the frontline’s in the other direction,” a familiar voice says, sounding amused.

“Skipper?” Eugene asks, unsure and not quite believing what his eyes and ears are telling him. He feels as if someone butted him with a rifle in the head and left him seeing stars.

Haldane limps over the ridge and chuckles. “Glad you boys still remember me. Now would you please put down your rifles or at least point them somewhere else? I think I’ve been riddled with metal bits enough to last me a lifetime.”

They lower their weapons at once and it’s Snafu who finally finds his voice. “Sorry, skipper, but first we thought you were a Jap, than we thought you were a ghost. You really with us?”

Seeing Haldane’s confused look, Eugene tries to explain, “Sir, we thought you were-” He can’t bring himself to finish the sentence because the pain is still too raw, and he is glad when Snafu steps in once more.

“Hillbilly phoned Battalion CP and they told us you were dead,” Snafu tells him bluntly.

Haldane stares at them, eyes wide with shock. “What?” Then realization dawns on his face, and he looks absolutely furious. “Oh, for god’s sake, those idiots! Three days ago, Captain Halton from Love Company got hit. He was brought to the aid station I was in and died from his wounds there. Someone must have gotten us mixed up.”

Eugene can’t believe they went through all this pain just because some jerk at Battalion CP didn’t listen well enough and got Haldane’s name wrong. So many nights spent in grief while their company commander had been alive and on the mend the whole time. He remembers Hillbilly’s quiet sobs at night and the dull, broken eyes that tended to stare lifelessly at nothing nowadays, and it just hurts that all this could have been averted if people had been more careful with their intel.

“Christ,” Snafu says, rubbing his hands over his face.

“Yeah,” Eugene agrees. He shakes his head disbelievingly. Looking back up at Haldane, he asks, “How are you doing, sir?”

“Pretty well, considering,” Haldane says, though he is still frowning and looking angry. He points to the white bandage that peeks out from underneath his collar. “The doctors got the shrapnel out at the aid station and stopped the bleeding. They told me it looked worse than it really was, though a few inches to the left and the shrapnel would have hit my artery.” He shrugs dismissively. “The one in my leg wasn’t bad, just bled a lot, and I was out for the first and most of the second day due to blood loss. I’m still a bit wobbly on my feet, but apart from that and some pain in my leg and neck I’m right as rain.”

Eugene knows that Haldane is most likely downplaying his injuries and probably went awol from the aid station by look of things, but he feels the tension of the last few days drain out of him nonetheless. For the first time since Haldane’s been gone, he finds himself smiling sincerely. “The others will be glad to hear that, sir.”

“Especially Hillbilly,” Snafu adds in a drawl. “He hasn’t been the same since you got hit, skipper.”

This makes Haldane’s frown deepen with worry. “How exactly?”

Eugene finds himself saying the things he couldn’t a moment ago. “Skipper, we thought you were dead,” he says honestly. “That affected all of us. Hillbilly’s trying, he really is, but we can all see he’s barely keeping it together.” Haldane looks at Snafu for confirmation and he nods. “He’s a good leader, sir,” Eugene adds, “He’s actually doing a great job of leading the company but without you here it’s like he’s lost himself. He’s … changed. And not for the better.”

Lowering his head for a moment, Haldane takes a deep breath, puts on a brave smile and then nods at them. “Well, he’s not alone anymore. I’ll make sure we’ll have our old Hillbilly back in no time.”

Snafu grins at him and it’s the first time in ten days that Eugene sees him do anything else but scowl. “Never doubted you for a moment, skipper.”

The noise of several pairs of feet trudging through mud heralds the arrival of the rest of the company from the frontlines. Dusk is falling around them and the men slowly return to their foxholes, with the exception of a few who are on outpost duty. When they realize that Haldane is back with them, alive and well, each and every one of them looks shocked. Some stop, shaking their heads disbelievingly. Others start to grin and nod at Haldane in greeting. Lieutenant Loveday stops to shake his hand when he walks past him.

“It’s good to have you back, sir,” he says in a heartfelt manner. “You’ve been sorely missed.”

“Thank you, Lieutenant.”

Hillbilly is one of the last to make it back, dragging his feet behind him and looking more dead than alive. The moment he spots Haldane standing against the setting sun, he stops dead in his tracks and his breathing stutters to a halt as he stares disbelievingly at Haldane who is cautiously smiling at him. Then, without warning, Hillbilly lets his weapon fall carelessly into the mud and starts running, jumping over foxholes and equipment as if his life depends on it. He runs like a madman, losing his helmet along the way, just so that he can get to Haldane as fast as possible, and it’s one of the most heartbreaking, yet joyous sights Eugene’s ever witnessed. When Hillbilly finally reaches Haldane, he almost topples them both over as he wraps his arms around him.

“Andy,” he chokes out in a hoarse voice that is filled with both desperation and wonder. As tightly as he can Hillbilly holds onto Haldane and presses his face into the side of Haldane’s neck that isn’t hidden beneath a bandage. “Oh god, Andy.”

“Hey, Eddie,” Haldane huffs out quietly, fondly, and brings his arms up around Hillbilly to hold him gently, as if he were something precious that could break at any moment.

“You’re here,” Hillbilly mumbles in awe. He touches Haldane’s face in such a careful and reverent way that it looks desperately intimate. “They said you were- I thought I’d never see you again, and now you’re here. H-how can you possibly be here?”

Hillbilly’s voice breaks on the last word and his shoulders start to shake. The sound of quiet sobs trying to be stifled fill the air for a moment until Hillbilly buries his head in Haldane’s neck and muffles them. Haldane raises one of his hands to push his fingers gently into the blond curls at the base of Hillbilly’s neck, while his other hand comes to rest between his shoulder blades in an effort to ground him.

“I’m alright, Eddie, I promise you I’m alright,” Haldane whispers into Hillbilly’s hair. “I’ve already heard what happened. CP got me mixed up with the captain from Love Company. I’m so sorry, Eddie. God, I’m so sorry I put you through this.”

“Doesn’t matter now,” Hillbilly murmurs. He presses his nose deeper into Haldane’s shoulder, effectively hiding from the world, and if anyone deserves to hide from this place, then it’s Hillbilly, Eugene thinks. ”You’re here. Just, stay with me.”

Haldane does. Eugene has no idea how long they stand like this, wrapped up in each other in the middle of the company. The other men are keeping their distance, though most of them can’t stop themselves from looking over at them every few seconds because they’re trying to come to terms with the fact that Haldane is back, just like Hillbilly is. For Eugene, the world finally feels right again. They have their skipper back and it gives Eugene hope; hope that they’ll somehow get through this.

After a while, with night rapidly darkening the world around them, Haldane asks quietly, “Eddie?”

“Mhm?” Hillbilly breathes out and he sounds so tired, his voice scratchy from crying. The only illumination around them is provided by star shells fired into the sky at random intervals. Eugene can see Haldane smile tenderly into Hillbilly’s hair. “How about we settle down for the night, hm? I think you could use some rest.”

“I’m not the one who’s hurt,” Hillbilly says softly, not moving an inch.

But he is, Eugene thinks. Maybe not physically, but mentally he is hurt so badly that he’s bleeding all over the place, and, judging by the sadness in Haldane’s eyes, their skipper knows it, too. With a small sigh, Haldane squeezes Hillbilly once more. “Well,” he says, “I’m pretty tired, too, and could use some sleep.”

Finally, Hillbilly nods. Eugene can see how hard it is for him to let go of Haldane. There’s an unoccupied foxhole right next to them and they step into it, with Hillbilly carefully helping Haldane to sit down against a wall of barely hardened mud. After a moment of silence Eugene hears Haldane whisper, “Eddie? Come here.”

There’s some movement and, with the light that another star shell brings, Eugene sees Hillbilly curling up against Haldane’s side with his head resting on his uninjured shoulder. His hand grips Haldane’s fresh uniform tightly as if he can thus physically prevent him from disappearing again. Haldane, in turn, wraps a blanket around them and simply holds Hillbilly. It seems to be enough, because for the first time in six days, Hillbilly willingly closes his eyes.

“I thought I’d lost you,” he murmurs after a while without opening his eyes. His accent is thicker than usual and Eugene’s pretty sure he’s on the verge of falling asleep. “Every day, I wished that someone would just shoot me, just so that it wouldn’t hurt anymore to think about you. I didn’t want to die,” he adds quietly. “I just didn’t want to live, if that makes sense.”

“Oh, Eddie,” is all Haldane says and Eugene has no idea what to make of that. He doesn’t think anyone in the company ever truly realized how devastating losing Haldane had been for Hillbilly, how much their two officers needed and depended on each other. It hurts to know that Hillbilly, one of the most well-liked officers in K Company, had been so close to giving up.

After a moment of silence, Haldane says in a whisper, “We’re coming off the line in a couple of days, after we secure the area around Shuri Castle, and then all of this will be over. I can’t imagine them sending us into combat once more after that, not with the state the company’s in.”

Hillbilly lets out a soft breath that sounds almost like a sigh. “Does this mean we go home, Andy?” he asks.

“Yes,” Haldane reassures him, tightening his arms around Hillbilly. “I don’t care what happens next in this war, whether we’ll be invading Tokyo or not; the two of us are definitely going home. I’m never putting you through this again.”

“It’s not your fault,” Hillbilly mumbles, sounding already half-asleep. “You know I’d follow you into another battle if you wanted to stay with King.”

Haldane lets out a shaky breath. “I know,” he says in a choked voice that makes Eugene wonder if he’s crying, or trying very hard not to. “And that’s exactly why we’re leaving. I’m not going to drag you to some other wretched place no one’s ever heard of and put both our lives in danger.”

“But you care about the men,” Hillbilly says slowly, not quite understanding.

“I do,” Haldane agrees, sounding unbelievably sad. “But you are more important to me than any other person on this planet, Eddie. And seeing you like this – this war is not worth it. It’s not worth jeopardizing our future any longer just because I feel guilty about leaving the men.” He sighs heavily. “For the last three years I’ve always put the company first and you second, and you never complained, not even after Peleliu when I told you I wanted to stay. You simply stayed with me and that was that. Coming to Okinawa was a mistake and I’m not about to make the same mistake again. This is me finally putting you first, putting _us_ first. We’re going home, Eddie.”

Eugene’s startled to hear Haldane talk this openly about himself and Hillbilly, about a possible future together, whatever he means by that. He agrees with Haldane, though, that coming to Okinawa when they could have gone home instead had been the wrong decision and he’s glad that Haldane is drawing a line here and allowing himself and Hillbilly to finally lay down their arms and go back to a life filled with happiness, laughter and peace. Eugene wants nothing more than to go home himself and see his family again, and he’s only been in the Pacific for a little over a year. He can’t even begin to imagine how Hillbilly and Haldane must feel, who have been in this war since the beginning of 1942 and haven’t seen their families in almost four years, maybe even longer in Hillbilly’s case who’d been with the Marines even before the war. If anyone deserves to go home it’s them, he thinks, and he’s genuinely happy for them, even though he knows he’ll be sad to see them go.

Hillbilly mumbles something then, but it gets lost in some firing on their left flank up on the ridge. Eugene catches Haldane’s quiet reply, though.

“Me, too, Eddie,” is all he says. Eugene doesn’t know what they’re talking about, but when nothing more is said, he looks over to them and can’t help but smile. Haldane is awake, but instead of watching the line he’s watching the sleeping man in his arms with a smile both soft and sad. Hillbilly is finally resting, looking peaceful and content, and a little bit less broken than before.

Haldane glances over to him then and catches Eugene looking. “Go to sleep, Sledge,” he tells him quietly.

“Yes, sir.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for the long wait. Over the last few weeks I've changed this chapter again and again, trying to get it just right because it's one of the most important chapters of this story. I can't really say whether I've succeeded or not, but if I don't post it now I probably never will. I really hope you enjoy it and I wanted to thank everyone, once again, for leaving kudos over the last couple of weeks.


	21. Okinawa – 04.06.1945

**21\. Okinawa – 04.06.1945**

They’re relieved by the First Marine Regiment about a week after taking Shuri Castle together with Item and Love. They make a sorry sight, coming down from the hills, covered in mud from head to toe, too thin and with dark circles beneath their tired eyes. They trudge along the slippery path to wherever they are supposed to rest. Eugene doesn’t care. He knows they’ll be off the line for at least a couple of days, maybe, hopefully, for the rest of their stay on Okinawa, and that’s all that matters. Everyone is in desperate need of rest, a proper shower and more food than their meager rations offer.

Ahead of Eugene, Haldane and Hillbilly lead the company, with Loveday and three other officers bringing up the rear. That’s all the officers that have made it so far, and there’s no more than about a hundred enlisted men left. Not everyone they’ve lost is dead: there have been various men, among them Stumpy Stanley, who caught malaria. Others suffered minor wounds, like Burgin who had to be taken to the aid station with shrapnel in his neck and still isn’t back. The rest haven’t been so lucky, and Eugene tries his hardest not to think of them, not yet.

It’s not just the physical wounds that are crippling King. After what they’ve seen and witnessed the last few weeks, no one is the same. People withdraw into themselves, become reckless, or just lose it altogether. Eugene himself has been close to snapping several times now. He’s frayed at the edges and glad for whatever time they’ll be allowed to rest. He just hopes it’ll be long enough for him and the rest of King to prepare themselves physically and mentally for another fight.

Up ahead, Haldane calls for a short stop and everyone’s flopping down on the driest places they can find even though it doesn’t really matter since they’re already soaked to the bone. Next to Eugene, Snafu leans back against a boulder and closes his eyes. He looks like a ghost of himself, face pale, eyes drawn with dark shadows underneath them. Eugene knows he isn’t the only one. They’re all ghosts now.

Snafu doesn’t even bother opening his eyes when Hillbilly walks up to them, but Eugene nods at him in acknowledgment. “Sir.”

Hillbilly nods back, but he still doesn’t smile like he used to. It worries Eugene. “Everything alright, Sledgehammer?”

“Glad to be off the line,” Eugene replies, and he means it. There’s nothing left in him of the kid who was so eager to follow his best friend into war. Now he just wants to follow Sid home and forget about a lot of things he wishes he had never seen or done.

“Aren’t we all,” Hillbilly agrees. “Get some rest. We’ll be moving on in 15 minutes.”

With that Hillbilly leaves, moves down the line, and Eugene watches him go. Out of all of them, Hillbilly’s the one who’s been changed the most by Okinawa. It’s like a part of him died when Haldane was wounded and thought dead, and even though Haldane is back with them now, has been for over a week, Hillbilly is still just as distanced as he was before. Eugene knows everyone can see it, has heard some of the others talking about Hillbilly when he’s out of earshot, and it makes him unbelievably sad because after everything he’s done for King, Hillbilly deserves so much more than his men talking behind his back, wondering when he’ll crack completely.

Eugene looks to his left where Haldane is standing and watching Hillbilly walk from man to man with a worried expression on his face. For the first time since Eugene’s known him Haldane looks utterly helpless, and that worries Eugene even more. He knows Haldane’s been trying his hardest to help Hillbilly get back to normal, but so far nothing seems to work. It’s as if Hillbilly simply doesn’t have the energy to grin and bear it anymore. He’s worn down to the core and the only time Eugene sees him close to being relaxed and smiling is when he’s near Haldane, and Eugene’s alright with that because it means the old Hillbilly is still alive somewhere inside. It means there’s still hope and that’s all any of them can ask for. He doesn’t need Hillbilly to make casual conversation if it’s too much for him. For now, it’s enough to know that there is still one thing left in this world that can bring him peace.

He watches Hillbilly retrace his step back to Haldane who greets him with a soft smile. “Everything in order, Eddie?”

Hillbilly nods. “Everyone’s just tired.”

“I think exhausted is the better word. Most of them look dead on their feed, including you. Come on, sit down.”

Dutifully, Hillbilly sits on a piece of rock that doesn’t look particularly comfortable from where Eugene’s sitting on the ground. Haldane steps up behind him, gently takes Hillbilly’s helmet off and hands it to him, before he places his hands on his shoulders and begins to apply pressure. For a moment, Hillbilly closes his eyes and sighs.

Then he realizes what’s happening and turns his head around to look up at Haldane. “What are you doing, Andy?”

“I’m trying to get you to relax,” Haldane says. Then he grins mischievously. “Is it working?”

Hillbilly huffs out a quiet laugh and lets his head hang. “Of course it is. My back is killing me.”

“You’re getting old,” Haldane murmurs fondly.

With a shake of his head, Hillbilly says, “I _am_ old, Andy. And I feel even older.”

They all do. The things they’ve seen and done have aged every single one of them way beyond their years. Their eyes reflect the horror and destruction of innocence that goes hand in hand with war. When Eugene looks around him, some of the eyes that are staring back at him look dead, devoid of any kind of feeling. Hillbilly’s not quite there yet, not anymore, not when Haldane can still make him smile like that, but Eugene worries that someday he will be. It’s a worry that increases with every day more they spent in combat. There’s only so much pain and grief the heart and mind can take, after all.

“If you don’t stop that I’m going to fall asleep,” Hillbilly mumbles and Eugene has to smile when he sees the content look on his face. It’s such a difference to the frown he usually wears nowadays.

“I’d let you, if I could,” Haldane tells him, and his hands still. He looks over the rest of the company, without taking his hands from Hillbilly’s shoulders. “But we’ve got to go. At least we’ll have a quiet night to look forward to.” He steps around Hillbilly and crouches down in front of him. His smile is blinding. “I’ll resume my duties later, then.”

“You’re crazy,” Hillbilly says, shaking his head, but he’s smiling and that’s exactly what Haldane had been aiming for from the beginning on.

“I have my moments.” He winks at Hillbilly before he stands up and addresses the company. “Rest is over, boys. Let’s get out of here and have some real food and beds, shall we?”

Several people are roused from their dozes and are grumbling, Snafu among them, but they fall in formation soon enough and King is back on its way, away from the fight and towards some well-earned rest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So many kudos for the last chapter, thank you guys so much! I'm afraid today's chapter will be a bit shorter since it's only about a little moment between Andy and Eddie and nothing big is going on. Though I can promise you that in the sequel, there will definitely be a chapter dealing with Andy's promise to resume his duties ;-)


	22. Okinawa – 14.06.1945

**22\. Okinawa – 14.06.1945**

After five blissful days of rest, Eugene and the rest of King Company are sent south, even though Eugene had hoped that they wouldn’t get sent back into combat at all or at least not so soon. Instead of going to the front lines, however, King is told they’re to patrol the area, much to the relieve of most of the company, Eugene included. He’d rather move around all day than sit in a muddy hole and wait for the Japs to blast them with shells if he had the choice.

Still, five days of rest haven’t been nearly enough to leave the horror of the past few weeks behind them, or to rebuild their strength, for that matter. They’re still short of men and supplies, although Burgin has finally returned to them after getting treatment for his shrapnel wound. Eugene can see the shock on his face clear as day when Burgin takes in the numbers K Company has been reduced to during his absence. He is even more shocked when Eugene tells him about what happened to Haldane and, as a consequence, with Hillbilly.

“They told you Ack-Ack was dead?” he whispered that first night he was back. When Eugene and Snafu nodded, he shook his head in disbelief. “Christ, no wonder Hillbilly looks like he’s been through every circle of hell imaginable.”

Once they arrived at their destination, patrols are sent out several times a day into different areas. Something has changed, though. Before he got wounded, Haldane had made sure that he’d always be involved in anything his company did if possible. He’s led patrols himself several times, one of them almost costing him his life on Peleliu.

Now, however, Haldane always stays behind and waits for them to come back, and Eugene suspects that it has something to do with Hillbilly, that Haldane either stays out of harm’s way because of the promise he made of putting Hillbilly first, or that he simply knows that Hillbilly’s reliability will be compromised as long as he’s worried about Haldane being out there, getting hurt, or worse, again. Whatever it is, Eugene knows the decision is the right one, not just for Haldane and Hillbilly, but for the company as well. They can’t afford to lose Haldane a second time, and they need Hillbilly to be sharp and alert.

Every evening when the patrols come back, Eugene can see the relief on Haldane’s face the moment he spots Hillbilly and knows he’s safe. They usually lock eyes and simply nod at each other, understanding and reassurance passing between them without a word being said. Haldane then gathers the patrol leaders around him for their reports and they have the rest of the evening off. It isn’t exactly restful, but it is a lot better than what they’ve been through so far.

This evening when Eugene and the other guys in his patrol, led by Burgin, come back, he knows at once that something is wrong. Haldane is standing where he usually stands when he welcomes them back, but his face is set in stone. No smile greets them and an awful foreboding fills Eugene’s stomach when Haldane tells them to fall in line before him. With every patrol that returns, the remains of King Company slowly gather before their captain. Hillbilly’s patrol is the last one to arrive and he stops mid-step when he sees Haldane’s expression. Realization dawns on Hillbilly’s face and he bites his lip.

“Boys,” Haldane begins then, looking over his company, but unable to meet Hilbilly’s eyes, “I have bad news. Tomorrow, we’re moving south to Kunishi Ridge to relieve some units of the First Marines.” Grumbling and muttering breaks out, and Haldane holds up his hand to signal for silence. “I know all of you are tired and disappointed. Believe me, I never would have thought they’d be sending us back out there in the state we’re in, but they’re doing it anyway and there’s nothing we can do about it but go. So I want you to get ready to move out in an hour, alright? We’ve got a job to do and we will do it.”

With more grumbling, the men around Eugene disperse to their tents to pack their gear. When Snafu passes him by, he mutters, “And I thought the peace and quiet would never end. Lucky us.”

Yes, lucky them. Eugene suddenly feels exhausted. He doesn’t even have the energy to be angry about the whole situation. Everyone knows that not only King, but the whole Fifth Marines are not fit for combat anymore. They’ve lost too many men on Okinawa to be seriously considered a fighting regiment. He wonders how badly off the First Marines must be to even get someone to consider sending the Fifth back to the front lines.

Shaking his head, Eugene turns to follow Snafu. He stops in front of the tent they share and turns around once more to see Haldane walking across the open space towards where Hillbilly is still standing motionless with his gaze fixed firmly on Haldane.

“Eddie?” Haldane says quietly, sounding unsure.

“I thought this was over,” Hillbilly mumbles back. “All these reports saying we were done, and now they’re sending us back? Don’t they know the numbers we’ve lost?”

Haldane touches his arm gently. “I know, Eddie. Believe me, I’ve tried everything I could to get the company out of this. Apparently we’re the best option they have right now, if you can believe it.”

Hillbilly looks lost when he shakes his head. “It’s not your fault.” He’s quiet for a moment, looking away. With a sigh, he rakes a shaking hand through his hair. “God, I don’t know if I can do this again, Andy. I don’t know if I can go out there. I’m sorry.”

“Hey,” Haldane says gently, stepping even closer, “don’t apologize, Eddie. Never be sorry for feeling like this.” He takes a deep breath. “Look, I want you to think about something I know you’re not going to like.”

Hillbilly stares at him warily, wrapping his arms around his middle. “Okay …”

“I could get you reassigned and away from combat and-“

“No,” Hillbilly says firmly. When Haldane tries to speak again, he cuts him off once more. “No, Andy. You’re not going to separate us. I won’t let you. Whatever kind of favor you think you’re doing me, forget it right now. I’m not going to leave.”

Haldane sighs. “Eddie, please, you just said yourself that you don’t know if you can go back into battle. I’m only trying to help.”

“I might not want to go back,” Hillbilly grinds out, “but not because I’m afraid of dying or because of combat fatigue or whatever you might think.” He looks away briefly, helplessly. “I’m scared of seeing you get hurt, Andy. I’m absolutely terrified that you will get hit again and won’t be so lucky this time. I’m scared of having you bleed out in my arms again, of not being able to help you, of being told that you’re gone. That’s what I can’t do, Andy. I can’t lose you again. I just can’t.”

They’re silent for a moment, just staring at each other. Hillbilly is breathing heavily while Haldane is just looking unbelievably sad. In the end, after taking a deep and steadying breath, Hillbilly is the one who breaks the silence. “So if there’s no way you can remove both of us from combat, and we both know you wouldn’t leave the men voluntarily at a time like this, I don’t see how we have any other choice but to go and make the best of it. We’ve got a job to do, just like you said.”

Haldane averts his gaze for a moment. “You know,” he says slowly, looking back at Hillbilly, “I’m just as scared that I’ll never see you again every time I send you on a patrol. I know how you feel.”

But he doesn’t, Eugene thinks. Haldane has seen Hillbilly injured, that’s true, and he must have been terrified, but he never had to go through days thinking Hillbilly was dead. He’s never been broken like that, but Hillbilly has and the scars are still open and bleeding and there for everyone to see.

“So here we are,” Hillbilly says in the end, shrugging his shoulders and avoiding Haldane’s eyes. He sounds defeated.

“This will be our last battle,” Haldane says, trying to sound optimistic. “We’ll get through it, somehow we’ll make it and then we go home and don’t have to be afraid anymore.”

Hillbilly scoffs at that. “There are always reasons to be afraid of losing someone, Andy. Always.”

The sentence is loaded with the weight of things left unsaid and Haldane doesn’t seem to know what to say. In the end, he simply touches Hillbilly’s arm gently. “I’m sorry, Eddie,” he mumbles so faintly that Eugene almost doesn’t catch it.

Hillbilly’s eyes close for a moment. “I know. Just, don’t send me away, and don’t leave me.”

Eugene knows Haldane can’t promise that, no matter how much he wants to, and he knows that both Hillbilly and Haldane know it, too.

“I’ll do my best,” Haldane offers softly.

It’s not enough, though, and never will be again, not after going through days thinking Haldane was dead. When Hillbilly takes a step back, effectively breaking the contact between them, Haldane looks briefly disappointed before he puts on a brave smile. “Do you want me to help you pack your things? I’ve already finished my packing.”

For a moment, Eugene thinks Hillbilly is going to decline, but then he nods. “Sure.”

Haldane’s answering smile is small and shaky and he gestures for Hillbilly to lead the way. They’re leaving the clearing and Eugene finally hurries into his own tent, not wanting to get caught eavesdropping. Snafu’s dark eyes greet him when he enters.

“How come good things never last?” Eugene asks him, not knowing why he does.

Snafu shrugs. “Because someone, somewhere, hates us very much, I reckon.”

Eugene’s inclined to agree with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick thank you once more for all the kudos! Only three chapters to go after this one and don't worry, things will get better =)


	23. Okinawa – 18.06.1945

**23\. Okinawa – 18.06.1945**

They’ve been back in the fight for four long days. None of them have slept much thanks to constant shelling from the remnants of Japanese who still won’t give up even though Okinawa is almost completely under American control by now. Eugene doesn’t know whether he should admire the Japanese’s devotion or find it utterly stupid. He knows he’s not a coward, but he’s pretty sure he’d rather surrender in a pointless situation and live to fight another day than die fighting for a scrap of land that’s already as good as overrun. But if he’s learned one thing about the Japanese soldiers it’s that surrendering is considered to be worse than dying. So on they fight, and more lives are lost on both sides for nothing. It makes him angry beyond measure.

Tension runs high among his fellow Marines in K Company as well. Lack of sleep makes the men jumpy and irritable. More than once words are being said in anger and later regretted. It doesn’t help that no one sees the point in fighting anymore, when Okinawa is for all intents and purposes already taken. Frustration and resentment show themselves through Marines throwing away their rifles when they won’t reload or pounding the stone walls in helpless anger when things become too much. Eugene hasn’t been guilty of any of that yet, but just yesterday he snapped at Burgin in such a disrespectful manner that later, after he’d calmed down, he’d been ashamed of himself and apologized profusely.

“Don’t worry about it, Sledgehammer,” Burgin had said. “We’re all on edge right now.”

Eugene’s lucky that Burgin isn’t one to hold grudges or take things too much to heart.

The few officers that King has left aren’t off any better than their enlisted men or NCOs. Haldane tries to keep the peace as much as he can, but stupid orders he has to relay coupled with the frayed nerves of his men don’t make it easy for him, and Eugene knows that even his patience is wearing thin. Hillbilly, on the other hand, tries to keep out of it as much as he can and is like a port in a storm of frustration. Eugene isn’t sure if it’s simply because it’s his nature to be this calm or because he lacks the energy to care anymore about fickle things like exhaustion and pointless maneuvers, but most likely, he thinks, it’s a combination of both.

Fact is, Hillbilly’s mere presence usually is the only thing that keeps Haldane from overreacting in situations when everything becomes too frustrating, like right now. Haldane is on the phone with the Battalion XO regarding their orders just a foxhole away from Eugene’s, and from the sound of things a heated discussion is going on. Haldane looks close to shouting when Hillbilly slides into the foxhole next to him and places a steadying hand on his shoulder. Instead of calling their Battalion XO out on his bullshit over the phone, Haldane takes a deep breath and calmly asks him to reconsider his orders.

Apparently the Battalion XO doesn’t, because the call ends with Haldane throwing the phone away. Hillbilly looks at it for a moment before he carefully picks it out of the mud and wipes it clean on his dungarees.

“He wants me to send a patrol out there,” Haldane hisses through clenched teeth. “For what, I wonder? We know where the Japs are. I don’t need to send men on a suicide mission for intel we already have.”

“Do you want me to go?” Hillbilly asks him quietly, putting the phone back where it belongs.

Haldane shakes his head. “No. You’re the only one I trust to keep me from doing things I’ll regret later. Send Lieutenant James and five men instead. He could use the experience.”

Hillbilly nods and, with a short squeeze to Haldane’s shoulder, moves out of the foxhole.

“Hope they don’t pick me,” Snafu mumbles next to Eugene while Hillbilly walks the few steps towards the foxhole James is currently occupying. “I sure as hell won’t volunteer,” he adds.

“I don’t think anyone wants to volunteer,” Eugene tells him. He doesn’t envy James at all. Being a replacement officer, James is not as well-liked by the men as Hillbilly or Haldane are, although he’s been with them since the beginning of the campaign. Fresh from the academy, Okinawa was his first combat experience and it wore him down pretty quickly. In the beginning, James had been eager for every mission and repeatedly volunteered for patrols. After seeing how the war really was like and that his orders could get men killed, that had changed. He didn’t volunteer anymore and now, knowing that the fighting on Okinawa was as good as over, James has the tendency to hide away as much as he possibly can, trying everything to put himself out of harm’s way.

Next to James’s foxhole, Hillbilly is crouching down and carefully shaking James’s shoulder to rouse him from his light sleep. “Got a detail for you,” he says when James opens his eyes. “Skipper wants you to lead a patrol of five men to scout out Jap positions.”

James stares at him for a moment in utter disbelief. “Is he nuts?” it finally bursts out of him and Eugene winces at the insolent tone.

Hillbilly stares at him with a frown. “Excuse me?”

“I’m not going out there,” James says defiantly. “That’s madness!”

“This was an order, Lieutenant,” Hillbilly tells him in no uncertain terms. “You will pick five men and scout the area.”

James glares up at him. “Why don’t you lead the patrol, then, hm? Oh, no, wait, I forgot. You’re Haldane’s favorite and have to be kept safe.”

Hillbilly’s expression turns stony. “You’re out of line, Lieutenant. This is not about me. Skipper’s got orders and he wants you to lead the patrol. Go or you will be reported.”

“So what?” James shouts angrily. “Go on, report me. Can’t get any worse than this, now can it?”

Marines are turning their heads towards the noise and Haldane is in the process of stepping out of his foxhole in order to intervene. James doesn’t stop, though.

“I’ve just been handed a suicide mission and you stand there as if it’s nothing, as if it doesn’t matter,” James hisses at Hillbilly. “But guess what, not everyone wants to die on this wretched island for nothing. So why don’t _you_ go and lead this patrol, seeing as you wanted to die so desperately just a couple of weeks ago.”

All the chatter stops abruptly. Everyone knows that a line has just been crossed. Eugene looks back at Hillbilly, expecting him to be angry, to shout at James, do something, anything, but he just stands there, staring at James in shocked silence.

“You have no right,” Hillbilly finally chokes out.

James glares at him. “I have as much right as Haldane has sending me into a death trap,” he spits out.

“That’s enough, Lieutenant!” Haldane tells him firmly as he, together with Stumpy Stanley and Loveday, steps up to James’s foxhole next to Hillbilly. “I don’t want to send you out there but our Battalion XO has ordered a patrol and there’s nothing I can do about that, so pack up your gear, pick five men, and go.”

James shrugs. “Send someone else. Send _him_ ,” he says, pointing at Hillbilly.

“And that would change what?” Haldane challenges him calmly. “Hillbilly, Stumpy and Loveday want to lead this patrol as much as you do. Sure, I could send any one of them so that you can go back to sleep, but the Marine Corps is not about wanting, it’s about getting things done, and right now you have orders that I expect you to follow, Marine. I won’t repeat myself.”

James has the audacity to grin up at him. “No, sir,” he says, mock-saluting.

The silence that follows is deafening.

“Very well,” Haldane says finally. He turns around and walks back to his foxhole to grab the telephone he threw away just moments ago. “Battalion CP, this is Captain Haldane, K Company. Requesting Lieutenant James to be taken off the line for court-martial. Cause is insubordination.”

All eyes are on Haldane as he listens to the answer. When James tries to protest, Stanley and Loveday dispose him of his weapons and keep him restrained in his foxhole.

“You just dug your own grave,” Stanley tells him in no uncertain terms.

Behind them, Haldane says, “Understood. Thank you, sir,” and hangs up the phone. He turns back towards his company. “I know you are all tired and want to go home, but I can’t have my own officers or anyone else questioning or defying the orders I give.” He turns to Stanley who still has a firm grip on James. “Take him to the MPs. They will take care of him.”

They watch James being led away, but Eugene can’t feel sorry for him. They’ve all been through the same campaign and while they have snapped at each other more than once during the last few days, no one has ever even come close to disobeying a direct order. As far as Eugene is concerned, Stanley is right and James is responsible for his own downfall.

“Now,” Haldane says after James is out of earshot, and there’s a grin on his face that looks utterly out of place after what just happened. It makes Haldane look years younger. “Battalion CP has good news for us. The patrol is cancelled. We’re shortly being relieved by the Eighth Marines. I think that’s it for us, boys. We’re done.”

They don’t dare to cheer loudly, but there’s excited voices coming from every foxhole around Eugene. He can’t believe they’re really done with fighting. It makes what happened with James all the more ironic, but right now Eugene feels nothing but joy and relief. A few more hours, and they will be out of here and finally able to rest. Beside him, Snafu looks at him with that lazy grin of his.

“Knew we’d get out of here soon.”

Eugene playfully shoves him. “Sure you did, Snaf.”

Snafu just shrugs and keeps grinning. Eugene shakes his head and looks out over the remains of K Company who look more hopeful and alive than they have in weeks. Hillbilly is slowly making his way through them over to Haldane’s foxhole that serves as Company CP, and suddenly Eugene realizes that these two can finally go home, too. His grin widens at the thought.

“You really sure this time, Andy?” Hillbilly asks quietly as he steps into Haldane’s foxhole. There’s a note of doubt in his voice.

Haldane nods, eyes warm and smile bright. “Yeah, I’m really sure, Eddie.”

Slowly, a tired smile spreads out across Hillbilly’s face and all the tension leaves his body. “Good.”

“You okay?” Haldane asks, laying an arm around him and pulling him closer. “James said some awful things back there.”

Hillbilly shrugs. “He was just tired and scared.”

“We’re all tired and scared,” Haldane points out. “That’s no excuse to talk like that.”

“True enough,” Hillbilly agrees. Then he looks at Haldane with earnest eyes. “I’m fine, Andy. What he said … he was wrong. I’m not like that anymore. And it doesn’t matter now anyway because we’re going home.” He shakes his head in disbelief and rakes a shaking hand through his curls. “I can’t believe we’ve made it.”

Haldane smiles at him and squeezes his shoulder once more. “Told you we’d get through this.”

Hillbilly huffs out a laugh. “Guess I should listen to you more often, hm?”

He closes his tired eyes and lets his head rest on Haldane’s shoulder. Eugene takes this as his cue to avert his gaze. Beside him, Burgin and Snafu are still grinning like maniacs and Eugene joins in, knowing that all their dreams of making it out of this war alive are suddenly within reach and that one day soon he will be back home and see his family once more. He can’t wait for this day to come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Thank you again to everyone who's left kudos for the last chapter! And special thanks to GleeGeneration23 for your comment! I thought I'd answer your question here because it might be of interest to other people. 
> 
> I was asked about the sequel to this story and it's great to know that there's interest in me writing one. The sequel will begin in Australia with Andy and Eddie's first meeting and follow them, much like this story, through the rest of the war and back home. It will be written from both their POVs and I'm going to alternate between them, depending on how it fits the story. So far, I've got about 15k words written (which is about half as much as this story has once it's complete). Most of the written stuff is post-war chapters, though, which means that it'll take some time until the sequel will be posted because I like to have at least a couple of chapters ready so I can guarantee regular updates.   
> I'm also working on another project right now (which is an Andy/Eddie Paleontology AU) because I needed a break from this verse. But the sequel will be written and it will be posted, just not directly after this story is finished. 
> 
> Speaking of which, this chapter is not based on any actual events apart from the fact that the Eighth Marines relieved the Fifth. As far as I know, a Lieutenant James never existed in K3/5. He's entirely made up because I wanted an example of what constant stress can make people do. I'm not entirely satisfied with how this chapter turned out, but I hope you enjoy it anyway.   
> The last two chapters will probably posted next week and the week after that so that the story will be complete by the end of March =)


	24. Okinawa – 15.08.1945

**24\. Okinawa – 15.08.1945**

The war is over. Those are the words everyone is repeating, but Eugene finds it hard to believe them. The world has been at war for so many years that it seems surreal that now, suddenly, it should be at peace again. He’s heard it took two bombs to finally end the war, and he wonders how devastating the destruction must have been to get a country like Japan, whose soldiers rather die than lose a fight, to surrender. In the end, with the Allied forces wrestling one Pacific island after another from Japanese control, he knows it would have been only a matter of time until they finally won the war, but Eugene is glad that it came to an end sooner rather than later. He’s pretty sure that the Fifth Marines with their severely depleted ranks wouldn’t have been deployed again even if the war had gone on until the end of the year but he’s glad he didn’t have to put the theory to the test. It wouldn’t have been the first time they’d be asked to do the impossible, after all.

Around Eugene, everyone is celebrating. Lieutenant Stanley even procured some alcohol for them, making the party all the merrier. Marines are running around like maniacs, with wide grins on their faces and bright eyes. Most of them are already unsteady on their feet and making fools of themselves. Malnourished as they all are, none of them is really used to alcohol anymore. It makes for a fun sight for those few not drinking.

Right now, Gunny Haney is in the process of losing his clothes in all the excitement, in honor of one last scrub in the rain, and Eugene has to grin at the sight. Deciding he doesn’t need to see this, he gets up and slowly makes his way through the drunken Marines and away from the commotion. There’s something he has to do, has wanted to do ever since Peleliu and never found the right time for. His feet take him along a well-worn path that leads towards the officer’s tents. He follows the familiar way towards the tent Haldane is currently occupying. The flap is closed and he’s unsure whether he should knock or leave it be for another day, not wanting to disturb his Captain.

In the end, Eugene decides to knock, because if there’s one thing he’s learned in the war it’s not to waste time or opportunity, because later one might not get another chance. “Captain Haldane, sir?” he inquires quietly. “It’s Eugene Sledge.”

“Come in,” a familiar voice replies softly, but it’s not Haldane’s.

Stepping carefully inside, Eugene lets the flap fall close behind him. There’s not much in the tent, except for a chest, two cots and a desk. The light is dimmed and Eugene can just make out Haldane’s form on one of the cots, his hair peeking out from underneath two blankets.

“He’s asleep,” Hillbilly says. He’s sitting at the desk, bent over some documents. In the weak light, the dark shadows under his eyes look even more pronounced than usual.

“Oh,” Eugene says, feeling like an intruder. “I didn’t mean to disturb.”

Hillbilly waves the apology away. “You’re not disturbing anything, Sledgehammer. I’m just finishing up Burgin’s papers to get his girlfriend over to the States. Wouldn’t do to keep young love waiting, especially now that the war is over, wouldn’t you agree?”

He sends him a small grin and it’s the first glance of the old Hillbilly Eugene’s gotten in a very long time.

“Burgie will be glad to hear that, sir,” he tells him.

“Well,” Hillbilly says, finally putting the papers away and stretching his back, “it would have been done sooner if Ack-Ack hadn’t been swamped with paperwork. Be glad you’re not an officer, Sledge.”

Eugene laughs quietly. “I am, sir.” He then points at Haldane’s sleeping form. “Is he alright?”

Hillbilly sighs and the grin leaves his face. He glances over at Haldane in worry. “The malaria’s back. He’s been shivering and sweating for the last three days and there’s nothing to do but wait it out and make him comfortable.” With a tired look, he adds, “And make sure he doesn’t work too much. I try to get as much paperwork and reports done for him so he just has to sign them. I’ve even moved my cot in here to keep him from getting up and working. He’s stubborn like this, you know?”

“Sounds like he’s in the best of hands,” Eugene says, trying to sound reassuring. “I’m sure he’ll be fine.”

“Let’s hope so,” Hillbilly says, trailing off. He stares at Haldane a moment longer, until he visibly forces his gaze away. “What is it that you wanted, Sledge?”

Taking a deep breath, Eugene says, “Well, I actually wanted to talk to both of you, sir. To thank you,” he clarified. “But seeing as the Captain’s resting, I think I’ll try my luck again later when he’s well.”

He’s already taking a step backwards and turning around, when Hillbilly tells him to stop. “Wait, Sledge,” he says, standing up. “I think he’d like to hear that. It’s time he takes his pills, anyway.”

Awkwardly, Eugene stands in front of the tent flap, watching Hillbilly kneel down next to the cot and carefully shake Haldane awake. He didn’t come here to make a fuss and had he known that Haldane has malaria, he never would have left the party in the first place. All the same, he’s glad he can finally get the words off of his chest.

“Andy?” Hillbilly says quietly. “Come on, time to wake up and take your medicine. And there’s someone here who’d like to see you.”

“Huh?” Haldane says eloquently. Eugene has to fight the urge to smile. His Captain looks utterly bewildered and sleepy with his mussed hair and flushed face. Then the shivering starts and Eugene winces in sympathy.

Hillbilly helps Haldane sit up and wraps the blankets tight around him before he hands him two pills and a glass of water. “Take them, and drink this.”

Obediently, Haldane follows the order and swallows first the pills, then drowns the whole glass. He looks exhausted just from doing that. Eugene feels even worse for being the main reason Haldane’s awake now.

“Good,” Hillbilly says, taking the glass from Haldane’s shaking fingers and bundling him back up in the blankets which are threatening to fall from his shoulders. Once he’s satisfied, he smiles warmly at Haldane and points behind him. “Sledge is here to see you.”

Eugene takes this as his cue to come forward. He walks around the cot and stands at attention before Haldane. “Sorry for waking you, sir.”

Much as Hillbilly did moments ago, Haldane dismisses his apology. “Don’t worry, Sledge. I can’t sleep all the time, anyway.” Hillbilly looks like he wants to argue that, but doesn’t say anything. “What do you need?”

“Nothing, sir,” Eugene says truthfully. He takes a deep breath. “I just wanted to wish you, both of you, a happy V-J Day. And I wanted to thank you.”

Haldane looks curiously amused despite the shivers that are wracking his body. “For what?”

“Well…” Suddenly, Eugene feels embarrassed and wonders what the hell he’s actually doing here. “It’s just, you did so much for us over the last few months. I can only speak for Peleliu und Okinawa, of course, but the fact that you both decided to come here even though you could have gone home speaks volumes about your dedication to this company. I don’t know if anyone has ever told you how much we appreciate that, because we do,” he says earnestly. “I know the both of you have been through a lot on our account, and things can’t have been easy. And that’s exactly why I wanted to properly thank you for your service – not to the Marine Corps, but to us, King Company. Having you with us made things a lot more bearable and I mean it when I say that I can’t imagine serving under a better command team.” He smiles at both of them. “So, not wanting to keep you up any longer, let me just say: Thank you, Captain Haldane, Lieutenant Jones. It’s been an honor serving under both of you.”

Eugene straightens up and salutes. It’s quiet in the tent for a moment, and Eugene begins to wonder if he said something wrong, when Haldane suddenly says, “Eddie? Help me up, please.”

The blankets fall away from Haldane’s shoulders as Hillbilly grips him under his arms and helps him stand. It’s only then that Eugene realizes how weak Haldane really is right now. His legs are shaking along with the rest of his body because of the chills, and Hillbilly has to keep an arm around his waist to keep him steady. Nonetheless, Haldane stands as straight as possible and returns Eugene’s salute with as much dignity as any sick man can. Hillbilly follows him suite.

“The honor is ours, Eugene,” Haldane says. It’s the first time he’s called Eugene by anything but his surname. “We couldn’t have done it without men like you.”

“It’s our job to take care of you boys,” Hillbilly adds with a thoughtful look. “God knows we haven’t always succeeded, but we appreciate knowing that for the ones who made it through, we’ve made a difference.”

Eugene nods. “You did, sir. You most certainly did.”

Haldane smiles at him warmly before he settles back down on his cot with Hillbilly’s help. “Now go ahead and celebrate the day,” he tells him. “You’ve earned it. All of you have.”

Eugene grins back. “Will do, sir. Get well soon.”

“I’ll do my best,” Haldane says. Then, with a mischievous glint in his eyes, he adds, “Nurse Jones will make sure of it.”

Hillbilly’s reply to that is a blanket thrown at Haldane’s head. “I’ll give you ‘Nurse Jones’, you ungrateful-”

Eugene doesn’t hear the end of the sentence because Haldane throws the blanket right back, but laughter follows him out of the tent and it’s impossible to keep the grin off his face as he walks back to his fellow Marines to celebrate the end of the war.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As promised, here is the second-to-last chapter of this story. I'm quite fond of it, because it takes a break from all the angst of the previous chapters. I hope you enjoy it as well.   
> If things go as planned, the last chapter should be posted next Sunday. And, as always, many thanks to the people who are leaving kudos! I very much appreciate it!


	25. Okinawa – Late September 1945

**25\. Okinawa – Late September 1945**

For most of the men, the war is over. Some have already been shipped home, others are waiting impatiently for their turn. Eugene isn’t. He doesn’t have enough points to go home, not yet. For him, duty awaits in China together with the other Marines of the 1st Marine Division who have to stay. Eugene’s heard some of them grumbling about the unfairness of it all, that the war is over and they still can’t go back to their families, but he doesn’t agree. People like Haldane and Hillbilly who have been in this war since its beginning and suffered through so much – they’re the ones who deserve to go home. Eugene doesn’t mind a few more months in the service, especially during peace times, and he’s actually looking forward to going to China. He knows he’s lucky to even be alive, and he’s most certainly not going to start complaining now.

Still, he can’t help feeling sad about leaving all his close friends behind, although there’s not much of K3/5’s old breed left nowadays since most of his comrades, Snafu among them, are already back on their way to the States. It’s mostly replacements who still remain, waiting just like Eugene for their deployment to China. They’re all set to board a ship in an hour, leaving Okinawa and the rest of King behind them.

There are a few veterans still stationed on Okinawa, Burgin among them. Just like Haldane, his malaria had come back in August, preventing him from going home sooner. He’d been devastated at the time, but word of Florence’s papers being approved had lifted his spirits considerably and aided in his recovery. Eugene knows that Burgin is now waiting for the next ship heading home, and he couldn’t be happier for him. He just hopes that everything goes well with Florence, and that Burgin gets the happy ending he deserves.

Looking around the tent he’s called home for the last two months for one last time, Eugene picks up his gear and makes his way over to Burgin’s tent to take his leave. It feels weird, being the one who’s leaving for once, when before people have always come to him to say goodbye.

“Burgie?” he calls out when he reaches Burgin’s tent. It takes only a moment for Burgin’s head to appear in the doorway.

“Sledgehammer!” Burgin says, and there’s a happy smile on his face. “Off to China soon, aren’t you?”

Eugene nods. “Ship’s leaving in an hour. I just wanted to say goodbye.”

Burgin’s eyes soften. “We’ve been through a lot, haven’t we?”

“We sure have,” Eugene agrees. Then he grins. “You had to put up with a lot of shit from us.”

Burgin laughs. “I sure did. You and Snafu gave me a run for my money. But to tell you the truth, Sledgehammer, I wouldn’t have it any other way and I don’t regret a single moment of it. I couldn’t have asked for a better mortar squad.”

Eugene smiles softly at him, the words moving him more than he had expected. “And we couldn’t have asked for a better squad leader,” he says truthfully. “I’ll never forget what you did for us.”

“I sure hope you don’t,” Burgin jokes. He grips Eugene’s arm tightly. “Be careful in China, Eugene, and return home safely. I expect you to be at my wedding in one piece.”

“I’ll do my best,” Eugene promises. “See you, then?”

Burgin nods and, with a smile, lets go of Eugene’s arm. “See you, Sledgehammer. Have a good journey!”

“You, too.”

Walking down the familiar path to the shores of Okinawa, Eugene takes in his surroundings and tries to memorize everything he sees. The island presents itself from its most beautiful side with the sun shining brightly and Eugene is almost sad to go. Some of the natives he came to know over the last months wave him goodbye on his way and the children giggle when he winks at them. Under different circumstances, he thinks, Okinawa might have felt like paradise. But he knows that his memory of the place will always be one of blood and pain.

When he reaches the docks, the area is already filled with people waiting for their turn to board a ship to China. Eugene looks for familiar faces in the crowd and makes his way over to his fellow Marines from K3/5. Letting his gear fall to the ground beside him, he is about to sit down in the sand when two familiar figures make their way over to them. All of King stands at attention the moment Haldane and Hillbilly reach them.

“At ease, boys,” Haldane says with a bright smile. Hillbilly stands beside him as he’s done so many times before, looking proudly at the men in front of him. “Once you board that ship,” Haldane continues, pointing behind them towards the harbor, “I will no longer be your Company CO. You will go on to China for occupational duties under a different commander, but both Hillbilly and I still expect each and every one of you to do his best.”

“We know you want to go home,” Hillbilly says, “and you will, probably sooner rather than later. In the meantime, remember that you are some of the toughest and best Marines there are to find and honor this outfit by fulfilling your duty.”

Haldane shares a look with him before he gazes back at his company. “So, behave yourselves over there, but don’t forget to have some fun along the way, too.” He grins. “You’re going to China, boys! That’s one hell of an experience you’re going to have and I’m pretty sure it’ll make for a better story to tell your folks at home than any battle account ever could.”

He looks at each and every one of them, then. “I hope to see all of you again one day when you’re back home. Over the last years, we have shared our lives, fought for each other and supported each other when things got rough. That is something that will always unite us, no matter how many miles lie between us, or how long we haven’t seen each other.” He pauses for a moment, looking over to Hillbilly who nods at him in support. When Haldane gazes back at the remains of his company, his eyes look wet. “I’m really going to miss you, boys. It’s been one hell of a ride.”

Someone in the back shouts, ”We’re going to miss you, too, Skipper!”, followed by someone else shouting, “Keep an eye on him, Hillbilly!”

Haldane starts laughing then, wiping his eyes on his sleeves. Hillbilly merely rolls his eyes, although he’s grinning as well. “Don’t worry, boys, I’ll make sure he doesn’t get lost on his way back.”

They all dissolve into laughter. Eugene knows he’s going to miss the two of them fiercely. He hopes their future will be a bright one, filled with nothing but laughter and smiles and good fortune. Out of respect, he salutes his two officers one last time, and his fellow Marines follow suit. Haldane and Hillbilly look at them for a moment with equally proud and sad smiles, before they salute back. Hillbilly’s eyes find Eugene’s for a moment and he nods at him. Eugene can almost hear him say, ‘Until next time, Sledgehammer.’

“Goodbye, boys,” Haldane finally says, voice filled with emotion and with one last smile, he turns away.

“See you soon,” Hillbilly adds, before he, too, turns around and follows Haldane.

Around Eugene, people are falling out of formation and settle down on the ground, chatting away, but Eugene’s eyes follow his former officers back up the path that leads away from the beach. Neither Haldane nor Hillbilly turns back around for one last look. Eugene thinks it’s probably because it was hard enough just now to turn away from the company they have both given up so much for. In a way, they just left the one thing that defined their lives for the last four years behind them. To step away from King and let someone else take over the company couldn’t have been easy.

Just before they vanish from sight, Eugene can see Hillbilly laying an arm around Haldane’s shoulders and pulling him closer to his side, and he smiles. This is how it’s meant to be, he thinks; one lending support to the other and never leaving his side. Over the last few months he’s seen them helping each other, seen how they’ve always managed to deal with everything the war threw at them as long as they were together. He’s never doubted them, never lost his faith in their leadership capabilities, not even when Hillbilly had been lost in grief over the false news of Haldane’s death. Eugene knows that the bond Haldane and Hillbilly share is special and whatever life may throw at them next, he’s sure they’ll face the future together. He wishes them all the luck in the world.

Behind him, a whistle blows and the boarding of the troop ship begins. The Marines pick up their gear, fall into line and wait for their turn. Eugene follows the example of Haldane and Hillbilly and doesn’t look back when he boards the ship. His way lies in front of him, in China, and he knows that soon it will lead him home, and maybe one day even back to Haldane and Hillbilly, and the rest of K3/5.

Eugene’s just said goodbye, but he can’t wait to say hello to them all once more.

**The End**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One final time, hello everyone!  
> I know I've said that the last chapter would be up on Sunday, but life got in the way and I'm sorry for the delay. Today, however, is the 70th anniversary of the landing on Okinawa. 70 years ago it was Easter Sunday and a day Eugene Sledge never forgot. I think today is pretty fitting to end this story. 
> 
> I wanted to thank each and every one of you who has read this story and/or left kudos or a comment. I really appreciate it and it makes me glad that people enjoyed the story. I tried to stay true to "canon" events, as much as that is possible since Andy and Eddie survive in this story. In the case of this last chapter, I therefore chose not to go down the road "The Pacific" took since Burgin, Snafu und Sledge actually didn't go home together because Sledge went to China. 
> 
> Andy and Eddie's story ends here since Sledge is leaving, but as I've said in previous chapters, I already have a sequel in the works which will be from Andy and Eddie's POVs, starting from their first meeting in Melbourne and ending sometime after the end of the war when they're back home. I don't know when the sequel will be posted since there's a lot of chapters that still need to be written and thought out, but I'm working on it.  
> I'm also writing a modern!AU right now which will feature characters from The Pacific, Band of Brothers and Generation Kill. It's a Paleontology!AU that has Andy and Eddie as paleontologists, Brad as a geologist and Ray as a preparator going on a field trip with their students that takes them across the country where they will meet up with Professors Winters and Nixon and their students on a dig site. This story will probably posted before the sequel of The Sound of Voices Two, though again it's going to take a while. 
> 
> Finally, one more thank you to all you nice people in the HBO War fandom that enjoyed this story! If anyone of you would like to talk about Andy and Eddie, or HBO War in general, you can find me on tumblr at ailendolin.tumblr.com. Come and say hi, because I'd love to meet other fans of the shows =)
> 
> Until later, then!


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